Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings

You : I know I’m just an ugly guy..*hoping to be praised*
Me : awwh, don’t be sad, there are many more uglier people out there..
You : ^!%!$#@$@^@**@&^@%$@
Me : =)

Submitted by: SR

No you’re not ugly.. It’s just that you’re face is few centuries out of fashion.

Submitted by: roya

Nothing is more discouraging than unappreciated sarcasm.

How much do you charge to haunt a house?

Submitted by: thomas geddes

Psychologist can’t fix stupid, apparently it’s not a disorder that is recognized.

Submitted by: Naomi

I hear voices and even they don’t like you.!

Submitted by: kallie 123

Women… Did you fall there Mister…
Me… Na I was trying to break a bar of toffee in my back pocket.

Submitted by: Sir Custac Cant

Someone said that you didn’t have half a brain, but I defended you, I insisted that you did!

Submitted by: Richard

Person 1: Is that you?!
Person 2: Nah, I’m an alien from the planet obvious.

Submitted by: Fred 'n' George

Me: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
You: Aww
Me: Cause your face is seriously messed up!

Submitted by: Alli

You’re only jealous cos the voices don’t talk to you.

Submitted by: Shadowfairy1996

Look at my face and tell me if it looks like I care.

Submitted by: chris

You’re pretty… See I can be funny too.

Submitted by: faith

I need you like a fish need a rain coat.

Submitted by: QUINNAE CAVER

Inside the fitting room:
Me: Hey Miss, it doesn’t fit me, do you have a larger size of this shirt?
Sales Lady: Is it for you Sir?
Me: No, its for the other guy on that room, I am wondering why I am fitting this one, can you get a larger size for him?

Submitted by: Ryan

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