Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings
1st Person: I totally hate you!!
2nd Person: And I totally care!!
I’m married but it’s not serious.
Sarcasm, Just another service I offer. What do you offer? stupidity?
Yes I missed you, but if you come closer my aim is about to get better.
OMG, Did you feel that.. I think the world just revolved around me.. I guess you were wrong.
I’m impressed, I’ve never met such a small mind inside such a big head before.
Person 1: Did you fall?
Person 2: No, a bunch a kids wanted to play ping pong with my a**.
You – “Well someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning!”
Me – “I’m sorry there’s a correct side to be waking up on?”
It takes patience to listen, however it takes absolute skill to pretend you’re listening.
Excuse me love, would you like a skirt to go with that belt?!
One thing I know is sarcasm is painful euphemism.
Try not to be sarcastic when you are not, it’s just as difficult as walking with your nose.
Sarcasm is a skill meant for a chosen few.
I’ll give you five seconds to find hell.
– Sweetie, I’m already there (:
Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
3 o’clock in the morning and your best friend calls
You: HEY!! Dude I’m awake and super hyper!!!
You: Dude, are you asleep?
Me: No stupid, I’m skydiving.
Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.
We are responsible for what we do unless we are celebrities.
I like you. People say I’ve got no taste, but I like you.
Person 1: Why are you so fat?
Person 2: I’m not fat. I am skinny, it’s just that because of all the fat you can’t see it.