Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 3
Sarcasm is the secret language that everyone uses when they want to say something mean to your face.
I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again.
I never repeat myself.
I’m definitely a morning person but often choose to sleep straight through it.
You : My dad bought me a new mirror, the old one is broken.
Me : I can see why
Me- “What time is it?”
You- “There’s a clock right there.”
Me- “Did I ask you where the clock was!?”
Look at you your in perfect shape……………for a circle
After being cut off mid sentence:
I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?
Person 1: You look great !
Person 2: Sorry ! I can’t say the same about you.
Person 1: Just do like me … Lie !
How can I miss you if you won’t go away?
You are about as useful as a white crayon.
Cashier: Hi can I help you?
Me: No I just stood in line for 10 minutes to say hi.
There is a strong need for a sarcasm font.
Person 1 : Watch my stuff.
Me : Why? Is it going to do a trick.
My imaginary friend says that you need a therapist.
Sarcasm: Helping the intelligent politely tolerate the obtuse for thousands of years.
Person 1: Can I ask you a question?
Person 2: You just did!
I’m not sarcastic, I’m brutally honest =).
Shut your mouth when you’re talking to me.
Your just jealous because the voices only talk to me.
3 A. M. Phone call
– Hey are you asleep?
– No, I was in coma thank you for rescuing me!
Person 1: You are so cool!
Person 2: Thank you! You’re not so hot yourself.
SSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHH! I smell something
About once a year somebody will ask me “Where is the ice?”
I reply “Check the oven”.
I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and I don’t want to see you everyday!
I clapped because it’s finished, not because I like it.
You: I’m going to be a comedian one day!
Me: *Bursts into fits of giggles*
You: Whats so funny?
Me: *gasps* oh! you were being serious, i’m sorry.
I don’t hate you. Its just my attitude has problems with your personality.
I thought I had seen the pinnacle of stupid… Then I met you.
Well, thank you. Coming from you, it means…absolutely nothing.
Cancel my subscription because I don’t need your issues.