Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 3

119

My friends are so much cooler than yours.
They’re invisible.

Submitted by: he
133

I’m not crazy! The voices tell me I am entirely sane…

Submitted by: thwhitewolff
13

I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again.
I never repeat myself.

Submitted by: Sir Custac
11

Cop pulls over a car:
Cop:Do you know why I pulled you over?
Driver: You thought I had donuts?

Submitted by: GumboCharlie
91

Expect nothing and you’ll never be dissapointed!

Submitted by: Amanda
36

Sitting in the cinema
Person1: Oh My God! Did you just see that?
Person2: Nahh, I paid $12 just to stare at the freakin roof. “?”

Submitted by: Kurisutii
8

After being cut off mid sentence:
I’m sorry, did the middle of my sentence interrupt the beginning of yours?

Submitted by: CJ
128

Teacher: We are going to play the quiet game.
Student: Are you playing too?

Submitted by: therandomone
22

We have a love and hate relationship….. He loves me, I hate him.

Submitted by: Jennifer
8

Cashier: Hi can I help you?
Me: No I just stood in line for 10 minutes to say hi.

Submitted by: jekah
18

I clapped because it’s finished, not because I like it.

Sarcastic Quote: I clapped because it’s finished, not because...

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Submitted by: Angel Geo
11

I’m sorry I was talking, while you were interrupting me.

Submitted by: dmitch
190

Jealously is a disease…get well soon!!!!

Submitted by: steph
13

3 A. M. Phone call
– Hey are you asleep?
– No, I was in coma thank you for rescuing me!

Submitted by: Jox_Touchdown
11

Life’s good, you should get one.

Submitted by: TTres
40

I’m definitely a morning person but often choose to sleep straight through it.

Submitted by: steve
9

Mom: *knocks on my door*
Me: What?
Mom: Are you in there?
Me: No, I went to Narnia.

Submitted by: Aiden
19

Sarcasm is the secret language that everyone uses when they want to say something mean to your face.

Submitted by: m&m
25

Me- “What time is it?”
You- “There’s a clock right there.”
Me- “Did I ask you where the clock was!?”

Submitted by: Jub Jub
17

Person 1: You look great !
Person 2: Sorry ! I can’t say the same about you.
Person 1: Just do like me … Lie !

Submitted by: Cii
15

*Me washing my car*
Person: Hey what’s up? Washing your car?
Me: No, I’m watering it to see if it’ll grow into a bus.

Submitted by: FAX_and_MANG
10

Don’t take yourself so seriously, no one else does.

Submitted by: Sofia
16

About once a year somebody will ask me “Where is the ice?”
I reply “Check the oven”.

Submitted by: reddevil109
34

You : My dad bought me a new mirror, the old one is broken.
Me : I can see why

Submitted by: SR
130

Look at you your in perfect shape……………for a circle

Submitted by: CF1

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