Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings

I love to hear you talk- the white noise is very relaxing.

Submitted by: nick

Don’t take yourself so seriously, no one else does.

Submitted by: Sofia

Oh… I didn’t tell you…. Then it must be none of your business.

Submitted by: Jennifer

I’m not sarcastic, I’m brutally honest =).

Submitted by: Lowkeyfan

How much do you charge to haunt a house?

Submitted by: thomas geddes

Oh yea you look so pretty I can’t take it.

Submitted by: casin

Someone said that you didn’t have half a brain, but I defended you, I insisted that you did!

Submitted by: Richard

As a matter of fact, the whole world does revolve around me!

Submitted by: Anarchy

I’ll try being nicer, if you try being smarter.

Submitted by: Lalee

Abusive Mom: Do you hate me?
Girl: No, I just wish you would get your next period in a shark tank
Abusive Dad: Do you hate me?
Girl: No, it’s just that if you were on fire I’d roast marshmallows.

Submitted by: Ryann

Mom: *knocks on my door*
Me: What?
Mom: Are you in there?
Me: No, I went to Narnia.

Submitted by: Aiden

*Me washing my car*
Person: Hey what’s up? Washing your car?
Me: No, I’m watering it to see if it’ll grow into a bus.

Submitted by: FAX_and_MANG

Judge: How do you plead?
Me: Not guilty your honer!
Judge: What have you got to say for yourself?
Me: Isn’t being ugly against the law?

Submitted by: Prince-Flames O. M

Some one comes to your house.
Them: Do you have a bathroom?
You: No, we just go in the back yard!

Submitted by: 1999:) 2012:)

One thing I know is sarcasm is painful euphemism.
Try not to be sarcastic when you are not, it’s just as difficult as walking with your nose.
Sarcasm is a skill meant for a chosen few.

Submitted by: Victoria

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