Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 6
Are you always this retarded or are you making a special effort today?
If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
There’s a fine like between being tanned, and looking like you rolled in Doritos.
Shut up, will you?” “Oh, I’m sorry, Your Highness, should I go get you your coffee and tea now?
Police pulls over a speeding car:
Cop: Mam, do you know why am I standing here?
Driver: Cause you got all D’s in high school?
You have no one to blame but yourself…Unless some other guy is standing next to you then you can blame him.
Zombies eat brains. You’re safe.
I feel so miserable without you, it’s almost like having you here.
– Stephen Bishop
“I’d like to call you. What’s your number?”
“It’s in the phone book.”
“But I don’t know your name.”
“That’s in the phone book too.”
You’re so cool.
Any cooler and you would be me.
You can’t face the problem if the problem is your face.
He was happily married – but his wife wasn’t.
– Victor Borge
Are you really stupid or you are just pretending?
Here let me drop whats imprortant to me and pay attention to you and all of your needs.
I’m impressed, I’ve never met such a small mind inside such a big head before.
Sarcasm is the last refuge of the imaginatively bankrupt.
– Cassandra Clare
You: “Why are you here?”
Me: “Well… Heaven didn’t want me,
And hells afraid I’ll take over.”
Sarcasm, because beating the crap out of people is illegal
A sarcastic person has a superiority complex that can be cured only by the honesty of humility.
– Lawrence G. Lovasik
It’s your lie…tell it however you want!
Don’t argue with fools, cos people from a distance can’t tell which one is you.
Sarcasm I now see to be, in general, the language of the Devil; for which reason I have, long since, as good as renounced it.
– Thomas Carlyle
If ignorance is bliss. You must be the happiest person on this planet.
Think I am sarcastic?
Watch me pretend to care!
Person: Go to hell
You: As long as you won’t be there
Sometimes I need what only you can provide: your absence.
– Ashleigh Brilliant