Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 7
Don’t argue with fools, cos people from a distance can’t tell which one is you.
If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
Think I am sarcastic?
Watch me pretend to care!
Before talking please connect the tongue to the brain.
Person: Go to hell
You: As long as you won’t be there
What did I do to give you the impression I actually care about what you think?
You- “oh find it funny do you?!”
Me- “hence the laughter”
Teacher asked why are you late?
Student: Because I didn’t come in early.
Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
I like you. People say I’ve got no taste, but I like you.
Person 1: ” You did not just do that!!”
Person 2: “no? watch I’ll do it again!!”
I went on a diet, stopped smoking dope, cut out the drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks.
Why are you late? The teacher asked…
I guess its because I didn’t make it in time…replied the student
Mom: You can’t have a coke now!
Kid: Why not?
Mom: Because it’s bad for you this early in the morning.
Kid: Well how does the coke know it’s morning?
If you’re too open- minded, your brains will fall out.
– Lawrence Ferlinghetti
Person 1: Are you watching TV on the couch?
Person 2: No, I’m sitting on the TV and watching the couch.
So did you choose today to humiliate yourself in public?
Sarcasm is the last refuge of the imaginatively bankrupt.
– Cassandra Clare
You have a very strong grasp of the obvious.
You: Are you sleeping?
Me: I’m not sleeping, I’m just trying to suffocate this bug in my eye… It might take a while.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
You: Do you think I am stupid.
Me: Its not your fault.
A person who aims at nothing is sure to hit it.
I’ll be a millionaire once I’m done making this device that lets you punch people in the face over the Internet!
There is a fine line between fashion and circus. So where’s the tent?