Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 7
Should I bring ladder so you can step out of my business?
Sarcasm, because beating the crap out of people is illegal
Sarcasm helps keep you from telling people what you really think of them.
What did I do to give you the impression I actually care about what you think?
Person 1: ” You did not just do that!!”
Person 2: “no? watch I’ll do it again!!”
If ignorance is bliss. You must be the happiest person on this planet.
Do you want me to accept you as you are, or do you want me to lie to myself and try to like you?
How much do you charge to haunt a house?
You have a very strong grasp of the obvious.
Text: You awake???
Reply: No didn’t you know I text in my sleep
Text back: Oh…text me when you’re awake…
5 minutes later…
Text: Are you awake yet?
Sarcasm is just another free service I offer. No refunds.
You- “oh find it funny do you?!”
Me- “hence the laughter”
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
You: Are you sleeping?
Me: I’m not sleeping, I’m just trying to suffocate this bug in my eye… It might take a while.
Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake when you make it again.
I like you. People say I’ve got no taste, but I like you.
You were looking good from afar.. Now you’re far from looking good.
Why are you late? The teacher asked…
I guess its because I didn’t make it in time…replied the student
If had a dollar for evry smart thing you say. I’ll be poor.
Sarcasm: The ability to insult idiots without them realizing it.
I love parents’ way of saying you have got a point “Don’t talk back at me!!”
You: Do you think I am stupid.
Me: Its not your fault.
Mom: You can’t have a coke now!
Kid: Why not?
Mom: Because it’s bad for you this early in the morning.
Kid: Well how does the coke know it’s morning?
I went on a diet, stopped smoking dope, cut out the drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks.
Person 1: Are you watching TV on the couch?
Person 2: No, I’m sitting on the TV and watching the couch.