Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 9
I was stopped by a policeman and his over excited sniffer dog the other day, my dog says you are on drugs, he said…
I said, I’m not the one with a talking dog mate.
Text: You awake???
Reply: No didn’t you know I text in my sleep
Text back: Oh…text me when you’re awake…
5 minutes later…
Text: Are you awake yet?
You’re right, violence is not the solution; it’s just part of the equation.
About once a year somebody will ask me “Where is the ice?”
I reply “Check the oven”.
Sarcasm is just another free service I offer. No refunds.
So it seems a certain person believes that I have a problem with sarcasm. Well thank you Captain Obvious for that startling revelation!
If Barbie had brains she could drive, ride horses, swim, walk and talk, remind me what can you do again.
Do you know sarcasm?
- I speak fluently in sarcasm.
The movie was awesome!! My favorite part was when it ended.
What? I don’t speak idiot!
Me: Use your brain. THINK. The group needs you.
Friend: What is this brain that you speak of?
Person 1: Where are you going?
Person 2: Oh, I’m sorry, I thought stupidity was contagious.
Person 1: You’re right. I probably should go before I get it from you.
There are two things in life that are infinite:
Human stupidity and and it’s defense- >sarcasm.
I’m sorry I was talking, while you were interrupting me.
Person: Go to hell
You: As long as you won’t be there
You have one foot in your mouth already. You should probably try for a second.
There is a strong need for a sarcasm font.
You: What are you doing?
Me: The answer to that question will be revealed from the God given thing that we call eyes.
Women… Did you fall there Mister…
Me… Na I was trying to break a bar of toffee in my back pocket.