Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 9

56

I feel like we’re apart when we’re in the same room! But If you keep talking, you’ll ruin the illusion.

Submitted by: Mass Of Thumbs
59

Bro: Did you see my pen?
Me: No, do you wanna see mine?

Submitted by: GKB PSYCHO.unit
9

Before talking please connect the tongue to the brain.

Submitted by: eeinjhel
23

Teacher asked why are you late?
Student: Because I didn’t come in early.

Submitted by: jennifer
18

Women… Did you fall there Mister…
Me… Na I was trying to break a bar of toffee in my back pocket.

Submitted by: Sir Custac Cant
12

Person: Go to hell!
Me: I must already be in Hell since you’re still standing here.

Submitted by: Nick
167

You always do me a favor, when you shut up!

Submitted by: Nana
10

The only thing to fear is fear itself and what 9 out of 10 doctors would prescribe.

Submitted by: shawnn
49

‘A’ is reading a book, ‘B’ says …
B: “Are you reading?”
A: “No, I’m staring at the book hoping that lasers will come out of my eyes and burn the book.”

Submitted by: Chiahjee
8

Sending Postcards From A Plane Crash (Wish You Were Here).

Submitted by: sarcasm
10

You must be really clever to act so stupid all the time.

Submitted by: Snailman
214

You’re unique just like everyone else!

Submitted by: Raden
12

If I had a dollar for every smart thing you said…wait no, then I’d be in debt!

Submitted by: SarcasticSarcasm=Me
56

No, I’m not ignoring you…I just lost interest in what you were about to say.

Submitted by: Mass Of Thumbs
14

Oh, I’m sorry. Were you under the impression that I value your opinion?

Submitted by: Everybodyhatesmeh
9

Me: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
You: Aww
Me: Cause your face is seriously messed up!

Submitted by: Alli
5

Person 1: “Does this look like a face of concern?”
Person 2: “It will if I smashed it in.”

Submitted by: some-tea
12

No you’re not ugly.. It’s just that you’re face is few centuries out of fashion.

Submitted by: roya
4

9 more hours and I can start behaving normally again.

Submitted by: Patience
11

Sarcasm (because punching people in the face is illegal) <3.

Submitted by: Rose
14

I’m not sleeping, I’m just checking my eyelids for holes!

Submitted by: kyliek
27

You’re only jealous cos the voices don’t talk to you.

Submitted by: Shadowfairy1996
7

I’ll give you five seconds to find hell.
- Sweetie, I’m already there (:

Submitted by: Haylee
60

3 A.M. Phone call… Hey are you asleep?… No I’m sky diving!

Submitted by: Dannie
13

You call this fat? I call this a 1 Pack!

Submitted by: Hunter

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