Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 9
A boy is hammering nails onto the table:
Mom: What are you doing?!
The boy: Is that a trick question?
I feel like we’re apart when we’re in the same room! But If you keep talking, you’ll ruin the illusion.
Person 1: Wow, I can’t play guitar as good as you do.
Person 2: Really?
Person 1: Yes, no matter how hard I try, I always play it better than you.
How much do you charge to haunt a house?
Bro: Did you see my pen?
Me: No, do you wanna see mine?
Tell me what gave you the impression that I actually care, so I can avoid it next time.
You always do me a favor, when you shut up!
Being hated and ignored by many, makes my life a lot more easier to handle.
Women… Did you fall there Mister…
Me… Na I was trying to break a bar of toffee in my back pocket.
Before talking please connect the tongue to the brain.
Teacher asked why are you late?
Student: Because I didn’t come in early.
Awkward moment – When your sarcasm is so advanced it makes you look stupid.
I’m sorry. My fault. I forgot you were an idiot.
You’re unique just like everyone else!
If I had a dollar for every smart thing you said…wait no, then I’d be in debt!
Some one comes to your house.
Them: Do you have a bathroom?
You: No, we just go in the back yard!
‘A’ is reading a book, ‘B’ says …
B: “Are you reading?”
A: “No, I’m staring at the book hoping that lasers will come out of my eyes and burn the book.”
No, I’m not ignoring you…I just lost interest in what you were about to say.
Sending Postcards From A Plane Crash (Wish You Were Here).
No you’re not ugly.. It’s just that you’re face is few centuries out of fashion.
Someone said that you didn’t have half a brain, but I defended you, I insisted that you did!
I find it funny…
But I have forgotten how to laugh..
I’ll give you five seconds to find hell.
- Sweetie, I’m already there (:
Last time I checked I didn’t ask for your opinion.
You must be really clever to act so stupid all the time.
Person 1: Only few people can practice two arts simultaneously.
Person 2: That is why I practice three. :)