Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings - Page 9
A boy is hammering nails onto the table:
Mom: What are you doing?!
The boy: Is that a trick question?
I feel like we’re apart when we’re in the same room! But If you keep talking, you’ll ruin the illusion.
I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
- Groucho Marx
Person 1: “Does this look like a face of concern?”
Person 2: “It will if I smashed it in.”
Bro: Did you see my pen?
Me: No, do you wanna see mine?
Person: Go to hell!
Me: I must already be in Hell since you’re still standing here.
There are two things in life that are infinite:
Human stupidity and and it’s defense- >sarcasm.
‘A’ is reading a book, ‘B’ says …
B: “Are you reading?”
A: “No, I’m staring at the book hoping that lasers will come out of my eyes and burn the book.”
I love parents’ way of saying you have got a point “Don’t talk back at me!!”
You always do me a favor, when you shut up!
Last time I checked I didn’t ask for your opinion.
A guy asks “Do you think I’m straight?”
My response: You’re as straight as a circle.
Sarcasm (because punching people in the face is illegal) <3.
You must be really clever to act so stupid all the time.
The only thing to fear is fear itself and what 9 out 10 doctors would prescribe.
Me: Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
Me: Cause your face is seriously messed up!
Sending Postcards From A Plane Crash (Wish You Were Here).
No, I’m not ignoring you…I just lost interest in what you were about to say.
You’re unique just like everyone else!
No you’re not ugly.. It’s just that you’re face is few centuries out of fashion.
9 more hours and I can start behaving normally again.
Women… Did you fall there Mister…
Me… Na I was trying to break a bar of toffee in my back pocket.
Oh, I’m sorry. Were you under the impression that I value your opinion?
Sorry, my fist meant to caress your face.
You’re pretty… See I can be funny too.