Sex Quotes and Sayings

1

I don’t know why they call it a Walk of shame. You just had sex last night and now everyone knows it. Sounds like a Walk of Win to me.

1

You’re 12, you should be loosing teeth. Not your virginity.

1

Chinese: Me not come to work, me sick. Boss: When I’m sick I have sex with my wife, try it. Later Chinese called back: It worked. Me better. You got nice house!

1

If you’re born in September, it’s pretty safe to assume that your parents started their new year with a “Bang”.

2

They say you shouldn’t lie to your doctor. But admit it, if they ask if you’ve ever had sex, and your mom is right there, you’re gonna say no.

5

Men use love to get sex. Women use sex to get love. Me? I use coupons to get pizza.

1

Safe sex is great sex, better wear a latex cos you don’t want that late text… that I think I’m late text.

0

If you’re man enough to knock her up…then, you better be man enough to support the child.

2

All men approve of premarital sex…until they have a daughter.

19

My sex life is like a Ferrari…I don’t have a Ferrari.

2

Sex is the consolation you have when you can’t have love.
– Gabriel Garcí­a Márquez

3

Golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at.
– Jimmy Demaret

4

Since sex got easier to get. Love got harder to find.

Sex Quote: Since sex got easier to get. Love...

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3

The nicer you treat her outside the bedroom, the naughtier it will get inside the bedroom.

Sex Quote: The nicer you treat her outside the...

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2

Dirty: Not all sex is great. It certainly has its’ ups and downs.

Submitted by: joshua michael levinson
3

Love is the cure to all diseases but sex is the only cure to a broken heart.

Submitted by: Virgz de bylz
10

A real man is one who can have fun with you, without being sexual.

3

Anybody who believes that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach flunked geography.
– Robert Byrne

5

Before sex.. you help each other get naked, after sex you only dress yourself. Moral of the story: in life no one helps you once you’re f****d.

5

Masturbation: the primary sexual activity of mankind. In the nineteenth century it was a disease; in the twentieth, it’s a cure.
– Thomas Szasz

1

Sex is like high school…you miss a period and you’re in trouble.

3

The best cure for a headache is good sex.

5

Remember, if you smoke after sex you’re doing it too fast.
Woody Allen

5

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go it’s pretty damn good.
Woody Allen

17

Women fake orgasms and men fake finances.
– Suze Orman


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