Short Funny Quotes - Page 14

I have great faith in fools; self-confidence my friends call it.
It’s not cheating unless you get caught.
Quitting smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I’ve done it dozens of times.
I think crime pays. The hours are good, you travel a lot.
I hope life isn’t a joke, because I don’t get it.
When I read about [...]

286 Comments to “Short Funny Quotes”

• 261. Rockymtnguy wrote on 15 December, 2009, 0:48

   Vote: 23   11  

  The future just ain’t what it used to be.
• 262. Chris wrote on 16 December, 2009, 4:30

   Vote: 9   195  

  You need to be good at atleast one of the two..
  Either convince the other person…else….

  …confuse him..!!!!
• 263. joker321 wrote on 24 December, 2009, 4:23

   Vote: 27   14  

  How to make an idiot wait????????? I will tell u later……..
• 264. The Covert Comic wrote on 24 December, 2009, 23:53

   Vote: 10   24  

  Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, shame on you again.
• 265. pyxle wrote on 27 December, 2009, 3:00

   Vote: 28   13  

  Every fight is a food fight when you’re a cannibal.
• 266. neonBRII wrote on 30 December, 2009, 2:40

   Vote: 29   111  

  Guns don’t kill people… Dads with pretty daughters do.
• 267. alfred delcome wrote on 2 January, 2010, 2:25

   Vote: 11   33  

  Any one can watch a monkey dance, But can you dance like the monkey.
• 268. Jagadeesh wrote on 3 January, 2010, 4:36

   Vote: 28   432  

  An Idea can change your life….but a girl can change that idea.
• 269. Eeshan Usapkar wrote on 3 January, 2010, 5:08

   Vote: 21   5  

  The question of whether computers can think is just like the question of whether submarines can swim.
• 270. ameliax wrote on 4 January, 2010, 22:38

   Vote: 34   225  

  When nothing goes right go left!!

  Do it today … it might be illegal tomorrow!

  I run with scissors it makes me feel DANGEROUS!

  My future is so bright ………. i need shades

  If a turtle loses his shell is he NAKED or HOMELESS ??
• 271. Luke/Balzo wrote on 7 January, 2010, 14:40

   Vote: 18   8  

  The more I study, the more I know, the more I know, the more I forget, the more I forget, the less I know so why study?
• 272. day wrote on 8 January, 2010, 13:33

   Vote: 17   6  

  My therapist says that I can’t see you anymore because you make me crazy.
• 273. IDK e IDC wrote on 13 January, 2010, 4:36

   Vote: 26   4  

  If swimming is so good for your figure then how do you explain whales???
• 274. Vicky wrote on 13 January, 2010, 16:13

   Vote: 11   9  

  I’m an outstanding student, teacher often asks me to stand out of the class.

  Without ME its just Aweso
• 275. mallikarjun wrote on 16 January, 2010, 10:00

   Vote: 36   10  

  Tell your girlfriend, i said thanks…!
• 276. ME!!! wrote on 5 February, 2010, 21:12

   Vote: 18   6  

  Who says common sense is common … watching people push the door when it clearly says pull.
• 277. shiarna wrote on 6 February, 2010, 9:20

   Vote: 26   11  

  I did not slap you, i simply high fived your face!!!
• 278. Publisher wrote on 9 February, 2010, 10:36

   Vote: 11   25  

  Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9!
• 279. Toffayok wrote on 10 February, 2010, 23:58

   Vote: 10   10  

  Why don’t you ever see Cupid with a girlfriend?
• 280. ~Juliette~ wrote on 11 February, 2010, 16:53

   Vote: 4   9  

  Without me its just aweso…