I am going to live forever or die trying!
Be nice to nerds, because you may end up working for one!
Who needs rhetorical questions?
I had superpowers until my therapist took them away!
If someone throws a rock at you, throw a flower back at them, but, make sure the flower is still in the pot!
I’m on a seafood diet.. I see food and then i eat it.
He who laughs last… Well, laughs last… What were you expecting me to say!!!
Superman really isn’t that impressive, anyone can stop a speeding bullet at least once.
Before giving a piece of your mind, be sure you have enough to spare.
Don’t believe any rumor until the government denies it.
If your life isn’t rich and creamy, you bought the wrong box of chocolates!!
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is ‘never try’.
I stepped on a cheerio this morning…. Does that make me a cereal killer?
The voices in my head aren’t real…my dog told me so.
Smile and the world smiles with you. Laugh and they’ll think your on drugs.
Get stoned… eat wet cement.
Join the army, visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.
He who laughs last doesn’t get it, and he who laughs first has the dirtiest mind!
Patience is a waste of time.
Classical music just confuses all the other voices in my head.
My password is ********* How many asterisks do you use for your password?
If you think things can’t get worse it’s probably only because you lack sufficient imagination.
I get bored in church. Why would I want to go to heaven?
I bet Einstein would have liked color.
I snore on purpose.
When I was a kid, I could buy a dollar for ten cents.
When life gives you lemon . . . . accept it silently cos you might be having Vitamin C deficiency
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I am going to live forever or die trying!
Be nice to nerds, because you may end up working for one!
Who needs rhetorical questions?
I had superpowers until my therapist took them away!
If someone throws a rock at you, throw a flower back at them, but, make sure the flower is still in the pot!
I’m on a seafood diet.. I see food and then i eat it.
He who laughs last… Well, laughs last… What were you expecting me to say!!!
Superman really isn’t that impressive, anyone can stop a speeding bullet at least once.
Before giving a piece of your mind, be sure you have enough to spare.
Don’t believe any rumor until the government denies it.
If your life isn’t rich and creamy, you bought the wrong box of chocolates!!
You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is ‘never try’.
I stepped on a cheerio this morning…. Does that make me a cereal killer?
The voices in my head aren’t real…my dog told me so.
Smile and the world smiles with you.
Laugh and they’ll think your on drugs.
Get stoned… eat wet cement.
Join the army, visit exotic places, meet strange people, then kill them.
He who laughs last doesn’t get it, and he who laughs first has the dirtiest mind!
Patience is a waste of time.
Classical music just confuses all the other voices in my head.
My password is ********* How many asterisks do you use for your password?
If you think things can’t get worse it’s probably only because you lack sufficient imagination.
I get bored in church. Why would I want to go to heaven?
I bet Einstein would have liked color.
I snore on purpose.
When I was a kid, I could buy a dollar for ten cents.
When life gives you lemon
.
.
.
.
accept it silently
cos you might be having Vitamin C deficiency