Short Funny Quotes - Page 18

598 Comments to “Short Funny Quotes”

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  • 341. pintu singh wrote on 4 September, 2010
     Vote: Add rating55 Subtract rating31 

    Common sense is the sense rarely found in common people.
    - Pintu

  • 342. Robert Gonzalez wrote on 8 September, 2010
     Vote: Add rating100 Subtract rating27 

    If silence is golden, then random screaming in public places is platinum! :D

  • 343. Solberto_Coronavich wrote on 18 September, 2010
     Vote: Add rating84 Subtract rating16 

    The correct phobic term for the fear of long words? Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia (!)

  • 344. Brandon wrote on 28 September, 2010
     Vote: Add rating71 Subtract rating18 

    I haven’t lost it. I just misplaced it…somewhere on this planet.

  • 345. hard2handle wrote on 30 September, 2010
     Vote: Add rating55 Subtract rating20 

    I still have a beautiful figure…. under couple of layers of cholesterol ;)

  • 346. Shnooki :) wrote on 30 September, 2010
     Vote: Add rating78 Subtract rating25 

    Stop asking for oranges! Some of us haven’t even received our lemons yet!!!

  • 347. Carlos wrote on 5 October, 2010
     Vote: Add rating227 Subtract rating21 

    Girl: If you were my husband I would poison your coffee.
    Boy: If you were my wife I’d drink it.

  • 348. Tim Braithwaite wrote on 6 October, 2010
     Vote: Add rating46 Subtract rating15 

    Despite the cost of living it’s still quite popular.

  • 349. Heather wrote on 6 October, 2010
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    Patience is a procrastinators excuse!!!

  • 350. abby wrote on 13 October, 2010
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    If you want to look young and skinny stand next to a bunch of fat old people.

  • 351. :..Guy.. wrote on 29 October, 2010
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    Mother In Law, an anagram of, Woman Hitler

  • 352. Ryerye wrote on 4 November, 2010
     Vote: Add rating46 Subtract rating36 

    We all know what the speed of light is…what’s the speed of dark?!

  • 353. bukenyaaw wrote on 4 November, 2010
     Vote: Add rating70 Subtract rating34 

    Students are the only costumers who don’t want what they paid for.

  • 354. ME wrote on 6 November, 2010
     Vote: Add rating58 Subtract rating43 

    If you see one goose it is called a goose. If you see more then one its called geese. How come when you see more then one moose it isn’t calles meese?

  • 355. Raghav wrote on 6 November, 2010
     Vote: Add rating39 Subtract rating29 

    They say, it’s darkest before dawn….so if you’re gonna steal your neighbors newspaper, that’s the right time to do it.

  • 356. Wasif Manjoor wrote on 13 November, 2010
     Vote: Add rating52 Subtract rating63 

    When life gives you lemons, sell them and buy the fruit you like.

  • 357. Mahum wrote on 13 November, 2010
     Vote: Add rating109 Subtract rating19 

    An idiot is a 44th floor window washer who steps back to admire his work.

  • 358. Joseph wrote on 17 November, 2010
     Vote: Add rating144 Subtract rating48 

    If money grew on trees, girls would date monkeys!!!

  • 359. ameago wrote on 18 November, 2010
     Vote: Add rating131 Subtract rating37 

    What do you call a cow during an earthquake?
    Milkshake

  • 360. Ujjwal wrote on 29 December, 2010
     Vote: Add rating81 Subtract rating28 

    Never do anything that you wouldn’t want to explain to the paramedics.

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