Short Funny Quotes

Don’t kiss by the garden gate, love is blind, but the neighbors ain’t.

Funny Quote: Don’t kiss by the garden gate, love...

Submitted by: Klang
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When life gives you lemons say “Screw you” And go find an orange.
Everything comes out right in the end, and if it isnt right, it isnt the end.

Submitted by: Samantha LeFavi

Of all the things I’ve lost, I miss my mind the most.

Submitted by: ~Joy96~

Vegetarians are killing the rainforest.

Funny Quote: Vegetarians are killing the rainforest.

Submitted by: captain crunch
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When God made me, he was showing off!!

Submitted by: Nandish

The hardest part about business is minding your own.

Submitted by: jay

I stepped on a cheerio this morning… Does that make me a cereal killer?

Submitted by: Kristine

Smile, and the world will smile with you. Laugh, and they’ll think you’re on drugs!

Submitted by: _FiLa96_

Girl: If you were my husband I would poison your coffee.
Boy: If you were my wife I’d drink it.

Submitted by: Carlos

I just got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory.
Steven Wright

Funny Quote: I just got lost in thought. It...

Submitted by: Kacey
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