Short Funny Quotes

When you get old and your kids ask
where all the money went, show
them the vacation videos.

Submitted by: mayur

So I ran into my ex the other day…
then I put it in reverse and hit him again

Submitted by: xXxAmandaxXx

Always follow the light out of the tunnel. Just make sure that its not a train.

Submitted by: Enos

So many men and yet so few brains.

Submitted by: Frandia

The truth hurts….. Thats why I lie =P

Submitted by: Allie

“THE IMPOSSIBLE…” what nobody can do until some body does…….

Submitted by: ukdarkangel

If you weren’t who you are … I’d like you!

Submitted by: Kassie

Would a fly without wings be called a walk.

Submitted by: blazinherb420

Your age doesn’t lie. Neither does that face.

Submitted by: joshua michael levinson

Sleep till you’re hungry, eat till you’re sleepy

Submitted by: Phillip

What does it mean when you live on a busy street and your mom tells you to play on the road?

Submitted by: Way2Hot

I intend to live forever, or die trying.
Groucho Marx

Submitted by: Wes

Everybody’s has a boyfriend or a girlfriend and I’m just like “I love food”.

Submitted by: Pritty

As I said before, I never repeat myself.

Submitted by: Bravo1560

I’m not crazy, my reality is just different from yours.

Submitted by: Jess

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