Short Funny Quotes - Page 16
I intend to live forever, or die trying.
– Groucho Marx
He who laughs last doesn’t get it, and he who laughs first has the dirtiest mind!
Your intelligence is my common sense.
I used to be indecisive, but now I’m not too sure.
If I can’t hear your heartbeat, you’re too far away.. <3
If swimming is so good for your figure then how do you explain whales???
There are three kinds of people: The ones who learn by reading. The ones who learn by observation. And the rest of them who have to touch the fire to learn it’s hot.
Why do people say life is short? Live the longest thing you could ever do…
I am here so what are your other two wishes?
Hating me won’t make you pretty!
If I followed you home, would you keep me?
You are like a dictionary, you add meaning to my life!
I went on a diet, stopped smoking dope, cut out the drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks.