Short Funny Quotes - Page 17
Technology made life easy, Humans lazy.
There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
– Steven Wright
I forgive and forget, because I have a good heart, and a terrible memory.
I will procrastinate later.
No one is as ugly as their driving license/identity card picture, nor as good- looking as their Facebook profile pic..!:D;)
If silence is golden, then random screaming in public places is platinum! :D
Boy:Hi can we be friends?
Boy: Come on I’m rich.
Girl: Hi I’m Claire, 22 yrs old,single.
Boy: My name is rich…26 yrs old…can we meet for dinner?
Girl: Sorry I don’t talk to strangers.
When I was kidnapped, my parents leaped into action…they rented out my room.
You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said “Parking Fine”.
Never do anything that you wouldn’t want to explain to the paramedics.
Your future depend on your what you dream, so go to sleep.
Me?? Stalk?? Nah.. I just observe.. At night… Behind a tree… Alone…
Math problems: Jane bought 72 sofas…WHO THE HELL WOULD BUY 72 SOFAS?!
I hate when you offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she’s not your friend anymore.
Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, and you’ll end up in the hospital.
I haven’t lost it. I just misplaced it…somewhere on this planet.
The question of whether computers can think is just like the question of whether submarines can swim.
You: Go to hell.
Me: I go on vacations there.
It’s better to cheat, than to repeat…