Short Funny Quotes - Page 17

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Technology made life easy, Humans lazy.

Submitted by: Megha

There is a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.
Steven Wright

I forgive and forget, because I have a good heart, and a terrible memory.
Funny Quote: I forgive and forget, because I have...

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Submitted by: Kuzai

I will procrastinate later.

Submitted by: Chiz

No one is as ugly as their driving license/identity card picture, nor as good- looking as their Facebook profile pic..!:D;)

Submitted by: Suvidha

If silence is golden, then random screaming in public places is platinum! :D

Submitted by: Robert Gonzalez

Boy:Hi can we be friends?
Girl: No!
Boy: Come on I’m rich.
Girl: Hi I’m Claire, 22 yrs old,single.
Boy: My name is rich…26 yrs old…can we meet for dinner?
Girl: Sorry I don’t talk to strangers.

Submitted by: just someone

When I was kidnapped, my parents leaped into action…they rented out my room.

Submitted by: Lynne

You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said “Parking Fine”.

Submitted by: Pseudonym

Never do anything that you wouldn’t want to explain to the paramedics.

Submitted by: Ujjwal

Your future depend on your what you dream, so go to sleep.

Submitted by: Ali Bakhsh Nasrat

I’m still waiting for that day…

Funny Quote: I’m still waiting for that day…

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Me?? Stalk?? Nah.. I just observe.. At night… Behind a tree… Alone…

Submitted by: Sosthy

Math problems: Jane bought 72 sofas…WHO THE HELL WOULD BUY 72 SOFAS?!

I hate when you offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she’s not your friend anymore.

Funny Quote: I hate when you offer someone a...

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Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, and you’ll end up in the hospital.

Submitted by: JoJo

I haven’t lost it. I just misplaced it…somewhere on this planet.

Submitted by: Brandon

The question of whether computers can think is just like the question of whether submarines can swim.

Submitted by: Eeshan Usapkar

You: Go to hell.
Me: I go on vacations there.

Submitted by: Vuyie

It’s better to cheat, than to repeat…

Submitted by: mariedy

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