Short Funny Quotes - Page 19

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If the grass is greener on the other side, you can bet the water bill is higher.

Submitted by: Doreen Deramo

The future just ain’t what it used to be.

Submitted by: Rockymtnguy

True skill comes without effort.

Submitted by: Longfellow

Dogs think: People love me, feed me, pet me, they must be God.
Cats think: People love me, feed me, pet me, I must be God.

Submitted by: Jenny

I’m not evil, I’m god with a twist.
I didn’t hit you. I simply high- fived your face.

Submitted by: Sara

Dont face your problem if the problem is your FACE hehehe

Submitted by: Lyka

Teachers call it cheating, students call it teamwork.

Submitted by: Lindsey

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
If “poli” means many, and “tics” mean bloodsucking creatures, then what does “politics” mean?

Submitted by: Laura

The universe contains protons, neutrons, electrons and morons.

Submitted by: Lexy

An optimist is someone who falls off the Empire State Building and after 50 floors says, “So far so good!”

Submitted by: Rachael :)
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