Short Funny Quotes - Page 19
Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
– Ambrose Bierce
I will not be impressed with technology until I can download food from the internet.
Childhood is like being drunk, everyone remembers what you did, except you.
The only way to look slim is to hang out with fat people.
Who invented Mondays, I’d like to have a word with him.
How can the world end in 2012l when we have yogurt that expires in 2013?
Thanks to all those who ask the awkward questions on yahoo answers so that we don’t have to.
Shin: a device for finding furniture in the dark.
– Steven Wright
Running away does not help you with your problems, unless you are fat.
I don’t really care whether a glass is half empty or half full, all I know is that I want my glass filled!!
It’s been more than ten years now
I let the dogs out
If the customer is always right, then why isn’t anything for free?
I don’t believe in superstition because it brings bad luck!
Be a nerd – no one can kill what already has no life.
Welcome to the dark side. What? Surprised? We lied about the cookies.
Immature is the word mature people use to describe fun people.
It is not easy going through life and being perfect. I thought I made a mistake once, but it turned out I was wrong.
If the batteries in our T.V remote are dead … Why do we keep pushing the button until our fingers hurt ?
All of us would like to vote for the best president, unfortunately he is never a candidate.
Patience is a procrastinators excuse!!!