Short Funny Quotes

I just wanna be rich enough to have Morgan Freeman read me bedtime stories.

I talk to myself because I only talk to people of a higher class.

Submitted by: I

Diplomacy is telling someone to “Go to Hell” in such a way, that they look forward to taking the trip.

Submitted by: Karen

I hate People who are taking drugs,
Especially Police and Customs Officers

Submitted by: Pete

Why don’t you ever see Cupid with a girlfriend?

Submitted by: Toffayok

My parents told me “You watch too much TV and should try reading more!” So I turned on the subtitles.

There’s no half- singing in the shower, you’re either a rock star or an opera diva.

Submitted by: - Kaila

Be nice to nerds, because you may end up working for one!

Submitted by: beto

This is my life and I don’t let others ruin it !!… I wanna do it myself :D

Submitted by: saba haghiri

I’m still waiting for that day…

My opinions may have changed, but not the fact that I’m right.
Ashleigh Brilliant


If my room is clean, it means that my internet is not working.

It is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer.

If others can do it…
..let them do it…

Submitted by: g0f0

Who says common sense is common … Watching people push the door when it clearly says pull.

Submitted by: ME!!!

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