Short Funny Quotes - Page 2

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Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak.
Steven Wright

Submitted by: Jinny

DON’T HIT KIDS!!!
No, seriously, they have guns now.

Funny Quote: DON’T HIT KIDS!!! No, seriously, they have...

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Submitted by: I

Don’t knock on death’s door. Hit the doorbell and run. He hates that.

Submitted by: I

Smile…It confuses peple..!!

Funny Quote: Smile…It confuses peple..!!

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Submitted by: Pankil

Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay in, the more wrinkled you get. ];

Funny Quote: Life is like a hot bath. It...

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Submitted by: Freak.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away, But if the doctor is cute forget the fruit.

Funny Quote: An apple a day keeps the doctor...

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Submitted by: sammie

If you can’t get someone out of your head,
.. Then maybe they are supposed to be there. <3

Submitted by: daprincessishere

I want to kill the hottest person alive… But suicide is a crime!

Submitted by: cassie

When I die, I wanna go like my grandpa…peacfully…sleeping…not screaming, like the passengers in his car…

Submitted by: ArmenianGrl

I ran into my ex today…put it in reverse and did it again!!!

Submitted by: olivia hawley

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