Short Funny Quotes

Why are they called apartments if they are all stuck together?

Funny Quote: Why are they called apartments if they...

Submitted by: tara:littlestar
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Smile…It confuses people..!!

Funny Quote: Smile…It confuses people..!!

Submitted by: Pankil
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DON’T HIT KIDS!!!
No, seriously, they have guns now.

Funny Quote: DON’T HIT KIDS!!! No, seriously, they have...

Submitted by: I
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Don’t knock on death’s door. Hit the doorbell and run. He hates that.

Funny Quote: Don’t knock on death’s door. Hit the...

Submitted by: I
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Life is like a hot bath. It feels good while you’re in it, but the longer you stay in, the more wrinkled you get.

Funny Quote: Life is like a hot bath. It...

Submitted by: Freak.
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An apple a day keeps the doctor away, But if the doctor is cute forget the fruit.

Funny Quote: An apple a day keeps the doctor...

Submitted by: sammie
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I want to kill the hottest person alive… But suicide is a crime!

Funny Quote: I want to kill the hottest person...

Submitted by: cassie
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If you can’t get someone out of your head,
.. Then maybe they are supposed to be there. <3

Funny Quote: If you can’t get someone out of...

Submitted by: daprincessishere
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When I die, I wanna go like my grandpa…peacfully…sleeping…not screaming, like the passengers in his car…

Funny Quote: When I die, I wanna go like...

Submitted by: ArmenianGrl
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I ran into my ex today…put it in reverse and did it again!!!

Funny Quote: I ran into my ex today…put it...

Submitted by: olivia hawley
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