Short Funny Quotes - Page 2
Save paper, don’t do home work.
Boys fall for me-
Because I trip them.
Don’t think of yourself as an ugly person, think of yourself as a beautiful monkey.
It always gets laughs!
I’m an excellent housekeeper..Every time I get divorce I keep the house ;- )
Life is Short – Talk Fast!
Save water and shower together
I love love love this quote!
If life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Then use the profits to buy an assault rifle. See if life makes the same mistake twice.
Why do stores that are open 24/7 have locks on their doors?
I wish my book of life was written in pencil … There are a few pages I would like to erase.
When life gives you lemons,
make grape juice,
then sit back,
and let the wold wonder how you did it.
It is easier to ask for forgiveness than it is to ask for permission.
If common sense is so common why is there so many people with out it??
When nothing goes right, Go left.
My mind is like lighting, one brilliant flash, then its gone…:(
Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.
Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted and the time of your life!
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the UP button.
Good girls ar bad girls that aren’t caught.
If you fail to prepare,
then prepare to fail
**when life gives you lemons.. Squirt it in your enemies eyes!!***
Rule #1 I’m always right
Rule #2 If i’m wrong please look at rule #1
Girls want a lot of things from one guy. Conversely, guys want one thing from a lot of girls.
If you love something, let it go. If it doesn’t come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.
When life gives you lemons…throw them over your shoulder and look for an orange
Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped
To learn you must make mistakes; when you make a mistake you often will get in trouble. So then why do teachers punish you when you get into trouble if you are only learning, which is exactly what they want you to do?