Short Funny Quotes
I was born intelligent…..but studies ruined me……
You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said “Parking Fine”.
Never do anything that you wouldn’t want to explain to the paramedics.
When I was kidnapped, my parents leaped into action…they rented out my room.
If silence is golden, then random screaming in public places is platinum! :D
I will procrastinate later.
Technology made life easy, Humans lazy.
Money doesn’t buy happiness, but it does buy everything else.
It is better to be rich & miserable than poor & miserable.
My ancestors didn’t fight their way to the top of the food chain so I could be a vegetarian.
Me?? Stalk?? Nah.. I just observe.. At night… Behind a tree… Alone…
I hate when you offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she’s not your friend anymore.
Seriously though, I cannot keep doing this every week!
Your future depend on your what you dream, so go to sleep.
My Reality Check bounced.
It’s better to cheat, than to repeat…
The question of whether computers can think is just like the question of whether submarines can swim.