Short Funny Quotes - Page 23

11

A boomerang is just a Frisbee for people that don’t have any friends.

Submitted by: Victoria
13

Never give loan to your friends, Otherwise you will lose both.

Submitted by: Mubarak Ali
25

When I see someone that is beautiful, I stare for awhile, and when I get tired, I put down the mirror. 8)

Submitted by: Hallie (11 yers old)
14

If you think you are too small to have an impact, try going to bed with a mosquito.

Submitted by: toshi kool
32

I ain’t got no bad grammar.

Submitted by: Bloodshot
17

My idea of multi- tasking is using a knife and fork at the same time.

Submitted by: chauncey
43

When I’m feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor’s dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself.

Submitted by: SteelrGrl
34

Daylight savings time is like cutting 24″ off the top of your blanket and sewing it to the bottom to keep your feet warm!

Submitted by: C.D. Rinck Sr.
28

If karma doesn’t come around and hit you in the face, I will.

Submitted by: Jilll
29

The party in hell, has been canceled due to the fire.

Submitted by: shelly omish
22

I live in my own world, but it’s cool, everyone knows me here!

Submitted by: Hey You
21

To find out a girl’s fault, praise her to her girl friends.

Submitted by: Sezza
41

People tell me to get a life, I say “HEY! I’m a gamer! I have tons of lives hahaha”.

Submitted by: DAR 2da CIE
4

There is only one machine in the casino that will give you money. ATM.

Submitted by: Rudy Nin
20

The first sign of madness is talking to yourself, the second sign is replying.

Submitted by: Chocolate88
31

Unicorns are real. They’re just fat and gray and we call them rhinos.

Submitted by: Kassie
31

Is it solipsistic in here, or is it just me?

Submitted by: Kirk
70

Behind every successful man is the absence of an annoying woman.

Submitted by: Shet Geym
19

All of us would like to vote for the best president, unfortunately he is never a candidate.

Submitted by: Yung Zavage
26

A clear conscience is a sign of a bad memory.

Submitted by: Becca
26

I recently stopped fighting my inner demons. We’re on the same side now.:)

Submitted by: Augusta :)
21

I’m confused… Wait, maybe I’m not…

Submitted by: Ale Angel
15

You know how they say, “Don’t try this at home”?
I just go to my friend’s house and try it.

Submitted by: Ale Angel
42

Why did the rabbit cross the road? Chicken’s day off.

Submitted by: Mike
14

Sometimes I pretend to be normal but it gets boring so I go back to being me.:p

Submitted by: heaven

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