Short Funny Quotes - Page 25

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After exercising I always eat a pizza…Just kidding I never exercise.

Funny Quote: After exercising I always eat a pizza…Just...

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Just because I have ADHD does not mean I can’t pay attent…

Submitted by: me

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
George Carlin

Funny Quote: Give a man a fish and he...

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Feed the hunger or else the hunger will eat you…

Submitted by: cassidy

Before giving a piece of your mind, be sure you have enough to spare.

Submitted by: erskmor4

I’m not insecure… I just don’t care.

Submitted by: Tasha

Some call it stalking I call it love.

Why do I end up liking the guy I can only think of.

I was uncool before being uncool was cool!

Get like you? naw Get like me.

I called your boyfriend g*y…and then he hit me with his purse.

When I said “I’d hit that” I meant with my car.

Go buy yourself a life on e- bay.

Few women admit their ages a few men act theirs.

Submitted by: Denisse

Can we go back to using Facebook for what it was originally for – looking up exes to see how fat they got?
Bill Maher

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I had superpowers until my therapist took them away!

Submitted by: Beth

If money grew on trees, girls would date monkeys!!!

Submitted by: Joseph
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