Short Funny Quotes
If someone says: “No offense”, he/she is about to say something offensive.
Inside me is a thin person screaming to get out … But she has trouble being heard through all the fat.
It’s been more than ten years now
I let the dogs out
Thanks to all those who ask the awkward questions on yahoo answers so that we don’t have to.
Insult: If beauty fades you have nothing to worry about.
Welcome to the dark side. What? Surprised? We lied about the cookies.
I don’t really care whether a glass is half empty or half full, all I know is that I want my glass filled!!
If the customer is always right, then why isn’t anything for free?
The only way to look slim is to hang out with fat people.
Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturers talk while other people sleep.
– Albert Camus
Be a nerd – no one can kill what already has no life.
Who invented Mondays, I’d like to have a word with him.
Hardest job ever: Working in a bubble wrap factory. Imagine the self control needed.
No matter how old or how bad a** you think you are, when a toddler hands you their ringing toy phone, you answer it!!
DAD- iPay.. …!