Short Funny Quotes
Stop asking for oranges! Some of us haven’t even received our lemons yet!!!
If someone says: “No offense”, he/she is about to say something offensive.
Inside me is a thin person screaming to get out … But she has trouble being heard through all the fat.
It’s been more than ten years now
I let the dogs out
Thanks to all those who ask the awkward questions on yahoo answers so that we don’t have to.
Insult: If beauty fades you have nothing to worry about.
No matter how old or how bad a** you think you are, when a toddler hands you their ringing toy phone, you answer it!!
Welcome to the dark side. What? Surprised? We lied about the cookies.
I don’t really care whether a glass is half empty or half full, all I know is that I want my glass filled!!
If the customer is always right, then why isn’t anything for free?
The only way to look slim is to hang out with fat people.
Be a nerd – no one can kill what already has no life.
Who invented Mondays, I’d like to have a word with him.
Hardest job ever: Working in a bubble wrap factory. Imagine the self control needed.
DAD- iPay.. …!