Short Funny Quotes
All of us would like to vote for the best president, unfortunately he is never a candidate.
It is not easy going through life and being perfect. I thought I made a mistake once, but it turned out I was wrong.
Immature is the word mature people use to describe fun people.
I hate how Monday is so far away from Friday and Friday is so close to Monday.
If the batteries in our T.V remote are dead … Why do we keep pushing the button until our fingers hurt ?
Patience is a procrastinators excuse!!!
I went to see my psychiatrist the other day and told him that I was talking to myself. He replied, “That’s all right. Just hold a mobile phone by your mouth.”
I have CDO, it’s like OCD but all the letters are in alphabetical order…As they should be.
If I spoke my mind, I would be in deep trouble.
There’s nothing to fear. Except maybe that weird guy over there.
To do is to be. – Socrates
To be is to do. – Sartre
Do be do be do. – Frank Sinatra
– Kurt Vonnegut
Alcohol doesn’t solve any problems, but then againm neither does milk.
If you can’t impress anyone with your intelligence confuse them with your bulls***!!!
Curiosity killed the cat, and saved the rat.
Tell your girlfriend, I said thanks…!