Short Funny Quotes

To do is to be. – Socrates
To be is to do. – Sartre
Do be do be do. – Frank Sinatra
– Kurt Vonnegut

Submitted by: Ashley Rushbrook

Curiosity killed the cat, and saved the rat.

Submitted by: sum

Why is it called a walkie- talkie if a vacuum cleaner isn’t called a pushy- sucky?

Submitted by: Quintin

If facebook was a subject I’d get A+++

Submitted by: Hassan Khan Sekmani

Alcohol may be man’s worst enemy, but the Bible says love your enemy.
– Frank Sinatra

You don’t need a parachute to sky dive, you need a parachute to sky dive twice.
You’re never too old to learn something stupid.
We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.

Submitted by: Braylin

There’s no vaccine against stupid.

Whoever said words don’t hurt never got hit in the head with a dictionary.

Submitted by: MrCoolGuy

How come when it’s us, it’s an abortion, and when it’s a chicken, it’s an omelette?
George Carlin

Homework kills trees.
So don’t do homework.

Submitted by: Krystal

Insult: If you’re dating an idiot, you have found your perfect match.

Submitted by: joshua michael levinson

It has come to my attention, that air pollution is polluting the air!
George W. Bush

Well if life does not give you water and sugar too, your lemonade is going to suck!

Submitted by: Lea

Every person tells minimum of 4 lies per day so approx 1490 lies a year! and the most common and favorite lies are I am fine and I was very busy…:)

Submitted by: paddu

If the world really ends in 2012, I wasted my whole life in school.

Submitted by: Candygirl

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