Short Funny Quotes - Page 28

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Do you believe in love at first sight or should I walk by again ?

They say that 1 out of every 5 people in the United States is Chinese. There are 5 people in my family so 1 of them is Chinese. It’s either me (Ben), my mom (Amy), my dad (mark), my brother (Keith), or my adopted brother (Long Hai). I think it’s Keith.

Submitted by: Ben

I live in my own world, but it’s cool, everyone knows me here!

Submitted by: Hey You

Follow your dreams…except for that one where you’re naked at work.

Submitted by: red27y

Quitting smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I’ve done it dozens of times.

Some days you’re the pigeon, some days you’re the statue.

Submitted by: Karen

Life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, so waste your time and have the time of your life!

People don’t grow up. They just learn how to act in public.

Submitted by: mooii

Young enough to know I can, old enough to know I shouldn’t, stupid enough to do it anyway.

I didn’t fall, the floor just needed a hug.

Submitted by: The Awesome 1

Who needs rhetorical questions?

Submitted by: conapetaz

Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.

Why is it called “after dark” when it really is “after light”?

I’ll bet you one dollar you’ll read this.

Submitted by: Walter

Google: I have everything. !!
Facebook: I know everyone. !
Tweeter: I know what you guys think!!
Internet: Gosh!!!w/out me. !!you guys are nothing!!!
Funny Quote: Google: I have everything. !! Facebook: I...

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Submitted by: hearty diamond

To be old and wise you first must be young and stupid, that’s my excuse.

Submitted by: Honey

Think if man evolved from monkeys then why do we still have monkeys?

Submitted by: Himanshew kagz

Every fight is a food fight when you’re a cannibal.

Submitted by: pyxle

Wear Short Sleeves! Support the right to bear arms!

Submitted by: Jazzy

Don’t drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink.

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