Short Funny Quotes
Music is my drug, YouTube is my dealer.:)
I would take a bomb, but I can’t stand the noise.
– Joe E. Lewis
Some say the glass is half full, some say the glass is half empty. I say “Are you gonna drink that?”
Follow your dreams…except for that one where you’re naked at work.
Young enough to know I can, old enough to know I shouldn’t, stupid enough to do it anyway.
Who needs rhetorical questions?
If a single teacher can’t teach all the subjects then how could you expect a single student to learn all subjects.
I hate how after an argument I think of more clever things I should have said.
Today’s Relationships: You can touch each other but not each others phones.
If there’s a Hell on Earth, it’s high school.
– Lisa Desrochers
Today is the National animal’s day, so please take a minute and remember your ex!
To be old and wise you first must be young and stupid, that’s my excuse.
Wear Short Sleeves! Support the right to bear arms!
People don’t grow up. They just learn how to act in public.
Don’t drink and drive, you might hit a bump and spill your drink.
Life is a waste of time and time is a waste of life, so waste your time and have the time of your life!
Most people are only alive because it is illegal to shoot them.
Flying is simple. You just throw yourself at the ground and miss.
It’s not denial. I’m just selective about the reality I accept.
– Bill Watterson
During surgery: “God performs miracles. I don’t.”