Short Funny Quotes

Good girls ar bad girls that aren’t caught.

Submitted by: Briana

Life is a waste of time, time is a waste of life, so get wasted and the time of your life!
If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the UP button.

Submitted by: Arjay

Rule #1 I’m always right
Rule #2 If i’m wrong please look at rule #1

Submitted by: Emma

**when life gives you lemons.. Squirt it in your enemies eyes!!***

Submitted by: kasey

If you fail to prepare,
then prepare to fail

Submitted by: bobby

Girls want a lot of things from one guy. Conversely, guys want one thing from a lot of girls.

Submitted by: Usama

If you love something, let it go. If it doesn’t come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.

Submitted by: AL-X

When life gives you lemons…throw them over your shoulder and look for an orange

Submitted by: the man
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Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped

Submitted by: hahahaha

A “Lion” would never cheat on his wife but a “Tiger Wood”.

Submitted by: Lakiyah King

To learn you must make mistakes; when you make a mistake you often will get in trouble. So then why do teachers punish you when you get into trouble if you are only learning, which is exactly what they want you to do?

Submitted by: J-Dog

I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
Steven Wright

Submitted by: Kacey

Adults are just kids with money.

Submitted by: jordan

I’m not a complete idiot. Some pieces are missing.

Submitted by: Kacey

Why do they put pizza in a square box?

Submitted by: win_ringette

School is a jail, the cells are the classes, teachers are the security guard and WE ARE THE PRISONERS!

Submitted by: ?i love my prettaye

Coffee, Chocolate, Men. The richer the better!

Submitted by: debbie

All I want is for one guy to prove that they are not all the same.

Submitted by: I

Relationship Status:
() Single
() In a relationship
() Married
() Engaged
() Divorced
(x) Waiting for a miracle

I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
W.C. Fields

Submitted by: mina

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