Short Funny Quotes - Page 3

I have always wanted to be a leading church choir singer. But that’s until I had all people in the church down in tears laughing. I’m so done with that.

Submitted by: Tebogo

If you pull enough strings, you’ll end up pulling ropes.

Submitted by: John Bennett Hartnett

Welcome to the 21st century, where people can laugh-out-loud without opening their mouth! #lol

Submitted by: Bx Lawrence

I want to have fun, but I don’t quite know how.
Malala Yousafzai

I have good looking kids. Thank goodness my wife cheats on me.
Rodney Dangerfield

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me.
Rodney Dangerfield

My mother had morning sickness after I was born.
Rodney Dangerfield

One year they asked me to be poster boy – for birth control.
Rodney Dangerfield

My marriage is on the rocks again, yeah, my wife just broke up with her boyfriend.
Rodney Dangerfield

I worked in a pet store and people would ask how big I would get.
Rodney Dangerfield

Copyright © 2006-2015 - Sayings and Quotes - All rights reserved.