Short Funny Quotes

Boy: Hi
Girl: Hi
Boy: I like someone..
Girl: Who?!!
Boy: She looks just like you…
Girl: OMG! You like me? I like you too…
Boy: Oh no. I like your..sister

Submitted by: Tikitiki

“Hahahahaha! I can’t believe you just tripped and fell over nothing!”
“What do you mean? I was just testing gravity…it works!”

Submitted by: Bri

“Killer Attitude”
Teacher : why are you late?






Student : Does it really matter? You still get paid !! =P

Submitted by: Chirag goyal (chiggs)

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.
Groucho Marx

Bungee jumping is suicide with strings attached!

Submitted by: M.J. McGuire

Every time I see a math word problem it looks like this:
If I have 10 ice cubes and you have 11 apples. How many pancakes will fit on the roof?
Answer:
Purple because aliens don’t wear hats.

Submitted by: sweetpea

The more I study, the more I know, the more I know, the more I forget, the more I forget, the less I know so why study?

Submitted by: Luke/Balzo
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I put the pro in procrastination.

Submitted by: Theodore

A tattoo is a permanent reminder of temporary insanity.

Submitted by: Kiera

The party in hell, has been canceled due to the fire.

Submitted by: shelly omish

I told my mom that my house was her house and she yelled at me, “Get of my property”.

Submitted by: The Awesome 1

Don’t kiss by the garden gate,
Love is blind, but the neighbors ain’t

Submitted by: ada ally
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I’ll be back in 5 minutes. If I’m not read the first sentence again.

Submitted by: Hitsugaya'sgirl

Weather forecast for tonight: dark

Submitted by: mackeeenzzie!

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
Dave Barry

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