Short Funny Quotes - Page 30


There is no I in fail… WAIT!…

Submitted by: Lol...

I put the pro in procrastination.

Submitted by: Theodore

Well if life does not give you water and sugar too, your lemonade is going to suck!

Submitted by: Lea

Never judge a book by its cover…read the cliff notes!

Submitted by: Muley

When the short people attack you, you won’t see them coming.
I didn’t trip; I was testing gravity. It still works.

Submitted by: SUmmy

L.O.L has gone from meaning laugh out loud to I have nothing else to say.
Pandas are the least racist..they’re black, white, and Asian
Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver, blue, purple, orange and all those other colors now.
I’m afraid of my mailman……..he knows where I live!!

Submitted by: SUmmy

Why don’t you ever see Cupid with a girlfriend?

Submitted by: Toffayok

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9!

Submitted by: Publisher

I did not slap you, I simply high fived your face!!!

Submitted by: shiarna

Who says common sense is common … Watching people push the door when it clearly says pull.

Submitted by: ME!!!

Tell your girlfriend, I said thanks…!

Submitted by: mallikarjun

I’m an outstanding student, teacher often asks me to stand out of the class.
Without ME its just Aweso

Submitted by: Vicky

If swimming is so good for your figure then how do you explain whales???

Submitted by: IDK e IDC

My therapist says that I can’t see you anymore because you make me crazy.

Submitted by: day

The more I study, the more I know, the more I know, the more I forget, the more I forget, the less I know so why study?

Submitted by: Luke/Balzo

When nothing goes right go left!!
Do it today … It might be illegal tomorrow!
I run with scissors it makes me feel DANGEROUS!
My future is so bright ….. I need shades
If a turtle loses his shell is he NAKED or HOMELESS ??

Submitted by: ameliax

The question of whether computers can think is just like the question of whether submarines can swim.

Submitted by: Eeshan Usapkar

Any one can watch a monkey dance, But can you dance like the monkey.

Submitted by: alfred delcome

Guns don’t kill people… Dads with pretty daughters do.

Submitted by: neonBRII

Every fight is a food fight when you’re a cannibal.

Submitted by: pyxle

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Fool me three times, shame on you again.

Submitted by: The Covert Comic

How to make an idiot wait????????? I will tell you later…..

Submitted by: joker321

The future just ain’t what it used to be.

Submitted by: Rockymtnguy

Selfishness: Lack of consideration for the selfishness of others.

Submitted by: mick

Some people are wise, some are otherwise.

Submitted by: Azrael

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