Short Funny Quotes - Page 31
Avoid hangovers: stay drunk.
An onion can make people cry but there’s never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.
– Will Rogers
Everything comes out right in the end, and if it doesn’t, go left!
When you stop making quotes about life giving you lemons, you will find true happiness in your life.
Do someone a favor and it becomes your job.
I have opinions of my own, strong opinions, but I don’t always agree with them.
– George Bush
Everyone wants to top in exams but no one wants to study.
I’m not fat your just too skinny.
I’m knot a blonde! I’m knot, I’m knot, I’m knot!
Parents spend the first part of our lives teaching us to walk and talk, and the rest of it telling us to sit down and shut up.
The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
– Groucho Marx
The trick to entertaining idiots is to give them a piece of paper that says flip this on both sides.
A baby monkey asks his father thus; father, why are we so ugly?
The father says: don’t stress my son, you should see the one reading this text.
If you need advice text me
If you need a friend call me
If you need me come 2 me
But if you need money :((
The subscribe can not be reached.
Girls want a lot of things from one guy. Conversely, guys want one thing from a lot of girls.
Someday they’re going to call me “M’am” without adding “You’re making a scene”.
When I get the urge to clean the house… I lay down till it passes.
If you think you are too small to have an impact, try going to bed with a mosquito.
Ever stopped to think and forgot to start again?
That moment of fear when you can’t get a ring off your finger.