Short Funny Quotes
Girls want a lot of things from one guy. Conversely, guys want one thing from a lot of girls.
If you love something, let it go. If it doesn’t come back to visit, hunt it down and kill it.
When life gives you lemons…throw them over your shoulder and look for an orange
Men are like parking spots, the good ones are taken and the free ones are handicapped
To learn you must make mistakes; when you make a mistake you often will get in trouble. So then why do teachers punish you when you get into trouble if you are only learning, which is exactly what they want you to do?
A “Lion” would never cheat on his wife but a “Tiger Wood”.
Adults are just kids with money.
I couldn’t repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
– Steven Wright
Why do they put pizza in a square box?
Coffee, Chocolate, Men. The richer the better!
I’m not a complete idiot. Some pieces are missing.
All I want is for one guy to prove that they are not all the same.
School is a jail, the cells are the classes, teachers are the security guard and WE ARE THE PRISONERS!
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.
– W.C. Fields
If Barbie was so popular, Why do people buy her friends ?