Short Funny Quotes - Page 4

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I’m the type of person that wants to get good grades but doesn’t want to study.

2

Valentine’s day without your love is like a year without the Internet.
- Santosh Kalwar

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YouTube, Twitter, and Facebook, are merging. The new program will be called YouTwitFace.

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There are three kinds of death in this world. There’s heart death, there’s brain death, and there’s being off the network.
~Guy Almes

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The greatest thing about the internet is that you can quote something and just totally make up the source.
~ Benjamin Franklin

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The Internet is full. Go away.

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Any idiot can put up a website.
- Patricia Briggs

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I hate it when I look horrible in a group photo and the person who looks good refuses to delete it.

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The golden rule of work is that the bosses jokes are ALWAYS funny.
- Robert Paul

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Waiting for the perfect girl? Idiot, even if you find her she’ll be waiting for the perfect man.

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There are three rules for writing a novel. Unfortunately, no one knows what they are.
- W. Somerset Maugham

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Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia.
- E.L. Doctorow

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So what? All writers are lunatics!
- Cornelia Funke

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There is only one dangerous breed: HUMANS

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There’s an old saying about those who forget history. I don’t remember it, but it’s good.
- Stephen Colbert

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They say that love is more important than money, have you ever tried paying your bills with a hug?
- Nishan Panwar

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If there’s no chocolate in Heaven, I’m not going.
- Jane Seabrook

1

3 blonds were walking through the forest when they came across some tracks. “Those are moose tracks” the first blond said. “No, there deer tracks. ” the second blond replied. “You’re both wrong,” the third blond retorted. “Those are elk tracks. ” the blonds were still arguing when a train hit them.

Submitted by: The Awesome 1
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Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.
- Benjamin Franklin

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I’m very proud of my gold pocket watch. My grandfather, on his deathbed, sold me this watch.
- Woody Allen


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