Short Funny Quotes - Page 4
A friend of mine said onions are the only food that could make you cry. That was before I hit him in the face with a watermelon.
I love it when I buy a bag of air & the company is nice enough to put some chips in.
I will not be impressed with technology until I can download food from the internet.
Don’t do drugs kids. There’s a time and place for everything. It’s called college.
If my room is clean, it means that my internet is not working.
Dear life, when I asked if my day could get any worse, it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.
Smart Man + Smart Woman = Romance
Smart Man + Dumb Woman = Affair
Dumb Man + Smart Woman = Marriage
Dumb Man + Dumb Woman = pregnancy
When I get bored, I look through my entire phone to see if there are any cool options I missed.
When I drink alcohol…everyone says I’m alcoholic but When I drink Fanta…no one says I’m fantastic.
My sex life is like a Ferrari…I don’t have a Ferrari.