Short Funny Quotes - Page 6
I went to see my psychiatrist the other day and told him that I was talking to myself. He replied, “That’s all right. Just hold a mobile phone by your mouth.”
That’s why they call it the American Dream, because you have to be asleep to believe it.
– George Carlin
Poor : When you have too much month at the end of your money.
Laughter is the best medicine but if you laugh for no reason, you need medicine.
We live in the era of smart phones and stupid people.
People who say they sleep like a baby usually don’t have one.
– Leo J. Burke
I’m not dumb, I just think less to avoid all the headaches.
School for 12 years, college for 4 more years, then you work until you die. Cool.
I hate when you offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she’s not your friend anymore.
Your age doesn’t lie. Neither does that face.