Short Funny Quotes

Don’t do drugs kids. There’s a time and place for everything. It’s called college.

When you get old and your kids ask
where all the money went, show
them the vacation videos.

Submitted by: mayur

Always follow the light out of the tunnel. Just make sure that its not a train.

Submitted by: Enos

School for 12 years, college for 4 more years, then you work until you die. Cool.

So I ran into my ex the other day…
then I put it in reverse and hit him again

Submitted by: xXxAmandaxXx

So many men and yet so few brains.

Submitted by: Frandia

If you weren’t who you are … I’d like you!

Submitted by: Kassie

The truth hurts….. Thats why I lie =P

Submitted by: Allie

“THE IMPOSSIBLE…” what nobody can do until some body does…….

Submitted by: ukdarkangel

Would a fly without wings be called a walk.

Submitted by: blazinherb420
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Sleep till you’re hungry, eat till you’re sleepy

Submitted by: Phillip

What does it mean when you live on a busy street and your mom tells you to play on the road?

Submitted by: Way2Hot

People tell me there is plenty of fish in the sea, well that is nice and all but I’m human, I don’t date fish .

Submitted by: ky

I’m not crazy, my reality is just different from yours.

Submitted by: Jess

As I said before, I never repeat myself.

Submitted by: Bravo1560

Brother: Did you know that ’sugar’ is the only word in the English language where the ’su’ makes the ’sh’ sound?
Sister: Really?
Brother: Yeah, I’m sure.

Submitted by: lisa

POLICE STATION TOILET STOLEN…Police have nothing to go on

Submitted by: DeAnna _starfish

If love is blind then how did it find us???

Submitted by: UR MOMS NEW BOY FRIEND

Why fight to live when we live to die???
YoungBlood: Because, perhaps there are few dying to live. :p

Submitted by: YoungBlood

If karma doesn’t come around and hit you in the face, I will.

Submitted by: Jilll

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