Short Funny Quotes

Miss are you good in algebra?
Do you mind substituting my “x”??? :P

Submitted by: stig

People want what they can’t have and when they get it they don’t want it anymore.

Practice makes perfect, but if no ones perfect, why practice?

Notice that you are noticing nothing worth noticing?

Submitted by: cassandra

If at first you don’t succeed, then skydiving is not for you.

Submitted by: Adrian

When I see someone that is beautiful, I stare for awhile, and when I get tired, I put down the mirror. 8)

Submitted by: Hallie (11 yers old)

Walking into a restaurant…
Waiter: Would you like a table?
Me: No, we came to sit on the ground… floor for five please.

Me when parents are sleeping: shh they’re asleep.
My parents when I’m asleep: Let’s vacuum for three hours.

I learned three things in school:
1. How to text without looking.
2. How to sleep with my eyes open.
3. And teamwork during tests.

Submitted by: Cassie

Stop waiting for Prince Charming. Get up and find him. The poor idiot may be stuck in a tree or something.

I’m not immature…i just know how to have fun.

Submitted by: KazeGirl

THINK its not illegal yet

Submitted by: Aryie

If I’m not back in 5 minutes… Wait longer..
Why do we kill people who kill people to show that killing people is wrong?
Everybody makes mistakes.. The trick is making em when nobody is around..
When life hands you lemons… Make apple cider.. Then sit back and have everyone wondering how you did it.

Submitted by: MiMi BaBiI

If you have something to say, please raise your hand and place it over your mouth.

Submitted by: Aniqa

People have told me to never say never – they broke their own rule!

Submitted by: Carla

QUICK!! What’s the number for 911!!!
]

Submitted by: Deanna

Why is there no egg in eggplant and no ham in hamburger?

Submitted by: win_ringette

L.O.L has gone from meaning laugh out loud to I have nothing else to say.
Pandas are the least racist..they’re black, white, and Asian
Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver, blue, purple, orange and all those other colors now.
I’m afraid of my mailman……..he knows where I live!!

Submitted by: SUmmy

Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
George Carlin

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