Short Funny Quotes | Funny Life Quotes | Cool Funny Quotes - Page 8

Life: Besides gravity, nothing keeps me down.

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A brain has two parts: the left part and the right part. My left brain has nothing right, while my right brain has nothing left.

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If karma doesn’t come around and hit you in the face, I will.

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My neighbor’s diary says that I have boundary issues.

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Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem.

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Why fight to live when we live to die???
YoungBlood: Because, perhaps there are few dying to live. :p

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My mother texted me “What does IDK, LY & TTYL mean?”
I answered: “I don’t know, love you, talk to you later”
Mother: “OK, I’ll ask your sister”

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If swimming is so good for your figure then how do you explain whales???

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There are three kinds of people: The ones who learn by reading. The ones who learn by observation. And the rest of them who have to touch the fire to learn it’s hot.

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The first 40 years of your childhood are always the hardest.

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I used to be indecisive, but now I’m not too sure.

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Why do people say life is short? Live the longest thing you could ever do…

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Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.
– Winston Churchill

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When I drink alcohol…everyone says I’m alcoholic but When I drink Fanta…no one says I’m fantastic.

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The girl who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

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Superman really isn’t that impressive, anyone can stop a speeding bullet at least once.

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I was good at math before they decided to mix the alphabet in it.

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Wise people think all they say,
Fools say all they think

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I did not slap you, I simply high fived your face!!!

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A truthful man doesn’t need a good memory, but a lair does.

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