I was good at math before they decided to mix the alphabet in it.
Wise people think all they say, Fools say all they think
I did not slap you, I simply high fived your face!!!
Forget the dog! Beware of kids!
A truthful man doesn’t need a good memory, but a lair does.
Just because the voices only talk to me doesn’t mean you should get all jealous. You’re just a little too crazy for their taste.
1f you c4n r34d 7h15, you r34lly n33d 2 g37 l41d
Energiser bunny arrested: charged with battery.
Old age dosen’t make you forget. Its all the stupid stuff you try to remember
Dogs think: People love me, feed me, pet me, they must be God. Cats think: People love me, feed me, pet me, I must be God.
Dear life, when I asked if my day could get any worse, it was a rhetorical question, not a challenge.
I scored high on my drug test.
Some Are Called Brave Because They Afraid to Run…
Did you know that 8 out of 3 people don’t get fractions.
I know I’m in my own little world..but it’s ok..they know me here!
When the short people attack you, you won’t see them coming. I didn’t trip; I was testing gravity. It still works.
Teacher : If your friend wants to borrow $5 and you gave him $10. How much will you get in return? Student : Nothing! Teacher : You don’t know Maths. Student : You don’t know my friend.
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally. – W.C. Fields
Dont face your problem if the problem is your FACE hehehe
What do you call a cow during an earthquake? Milkshake
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