Stupid Quotes & Sayings

I’ve read about foreign policy and studied, I now know the number of continents.
– George Wallace

Now we are trying to get unemployment to go up, and I think we’re going to succeed.
Ronald Reagan

If I’m going crazy, can you give me directions?

Submitted by: andrea

I wouldn’t say you’re stupid. You are, but I wouldn’t say it.

Submitted by: Jessie

Why is it called lipstick – when you can still move your lips???

Submitted by: angiebaby

The private enterprise system indicates that some people have higher incomes than others.
– Gerry Brown

I love sports. Whenever I can, I always watch the Detroit Tigers on the radio.
– Gerald Ford

Sure, it’s going to kill a lot of people, but they may be dying of something else anyway.
– Othal Brand

If Lincoln was alive today, he’d roll over in his grave.
– Gerald Ford

Bagels, bagels, I like bagels! Soft and round, round and soft with a spot.
Spot, I had a dog named spot once. He had a long life.
Life. Lemme tell you something about life. It cost 10 bucks. That’s crazy right?
One time I was so crazy they stuck me in a looney box and guess what the fed me there
Bagels, bagels I like bagels.

Submitted by: APerson

If I pick you up. And you pick me up, will we be floating?

Submitted by: Hannanana

I worked so hard to be stupid but just make it look easy.

Submitted by: sillywilly

A low voter turnout is an indication of fewer people going to the polls.
– Dan Quayle

The government is not doing enough about cleaning up the environment. This is a good planet.

You know you’re stupid if your friends are smarter than you.

Submitted by: Javier

I am not stupid. The guy that I pay to think and do my work for me is.

Submitted by: I Am So Confused Right Now

I’m not crazy. My imaginary friends can prove it.

Submitted by: Lissy-lover

Why can’t I get any soup with this fork?

Submitted by: A Stupid Friend

I’m not crazy just the voices are!

Submitted by: HeAtH hArRiS

People should have to take an IQ test before they’re allowed to breed.

Submitted by: Jimmy It

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