Stupid Quotes & Sayings

I never lost my mind, I lost half and the other half went to look for it.

Submitted by: richard

I have two daughters…both are girls!

Submitted by: babu

Do you know how much a polar bear weighs?
Enough to break the ice.

Submitted by: Sylvia

People always say you can be who you wanna be but I can never be a giraffe.

Submitted by: Cookie Monster

Important NOTICE: If you have noticed this notice, eventually you’ll realize that this notice isn’t worth noticing.

Submitted by: confucius

Adults say if you work hard you can be any thing you want but I’m still not a whale yet!!\

Submitted by: Enid

I’m always right…except when I’m wrong.

Submitted by: redalert286

I told my girlfriend I needed some “alone” time and she said “Do you want me to join you”?

Submitted by: Tony Allison

I never apologize, I’m sorry but that’s just the way I am.

Submitted by: Anna

I don’t care if you people think I am stupid…my dog begs to differ.

Submitted by: Justin Jose
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I’m giving you a definite maybe.
– Sam Goldwyn

I know only two tunes. One of them is “Yankee Doodle” and the other isn’t.
– Ulysses S. Grant

Yes, females do pursue me (if you count mosquitoes).

It’s bad luck to be superstitious.

Celibacy is not hereditary.

Excuse me, but do these stairs go up?

Traffic is moving at a standstill.
– Traffic Reporter

This project is so important that we can’t let things that are more important interfere with it.
Winter related injuries occur more often in winter.
– Newswoman

Submitted by: Bob

You can’t fix stupid, but you can punch it.

Submitted by: Lauren

There’s a fine line between genius and stupidity… I like to jump rope with that line.

Submitted by: amber.kai

I’m not stupid I just don’t get the point of being smart.

Submitted by: mrs.rejected

Procrastinators unite!…Tomorrow

Submitted by: awesomesaurus

If I’m going crazy, can you give me directions?

Submitted by: andrea

If someone is driving you crazy, what are they driving?

Submitted by: andrea

I am a member of NAPWDLA…National Association of People Who Don’t Like Abbreviations

Submitted by: Alex

Hurry up slowly in a very quick tortoise pace…thank you very much please!

Submitted by: Kelvin-d

I am never serious. Seriously.

Submitted by: iLoveFriedChicken
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Imagine a tsunami was coming?
Would you…
a.) Run for cover
b.) Go surfing
c.) Run to the nearest mountain or
d.) Help your family?
You know what I’ll do?
STOP IMAGINING!

Submitted by: Nelly

Remember to look both ways before getting hit by a car.

Submitted by: Paul Barney

When it comes to stupidity, he is a genius.

Submitted by: mahmoud

Today, I took an elevator up from the top floor to the basement.

Submitted by: Arzeimuth

Have you ever wondered why sheep don’t shrink when they get wet?

Submitted by: Kris

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