T-Shirt Quotes and Sayings - Page 4
Beat the 5 o’clock rush – Leave work at noon.
You may not Notice but I Know You’re watching Me
After a year in therapy my psychiatrist said to me, “Maybe life isn’t for everyone”.
I don’t have an attitude problem, you have a perception problem.
DON’T FOLLOW ME..I’M LOST..
A hangover is the wrath of grapes.
I can only compensate so much for other people’s stupidity.
If plugging it in doesn’t help, then try turning it on.
You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be misquoted and then used against you.
Drive defensively, buy a tank!
Thank you for calling tech support, you’re ignorance is my job security.
Always remember… You’re unique just like everyone else.
Excuse me, but do I look like someone who cares ?
Do not disturb, I’m disturbed enough already.
I don’t have a license to kill, I have a learners permit.
People like you are the reason people like me need medication.
If I throw a stick, will you leave?
FAILURE is not an option, it comes all bundled up with the software.
FOR SALE: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain.
I would put something CLEVER here… But you just wouldn’t get it!
Those who think they know everything annoy those of us that actually do.
Warning! This shirt has sharp edges.
Silence is golden, but DUCTAPE is shiny.
Try to not let your mind wander, it’s much too small to be out on it’s own.
It’s kind’a hard to show that I care, be e see a you s e I d o n ’ t.
To my best recollection, I can’t remember.
7 out of 3 people are math illiterate.
I’m going off to go find myself. If I’m not back by the time I return, keep me here.
If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving just isn’t for you.
If I gave a cr*p, you would be the first person I’d give it to.
I know all the answers, but I’ve been sworn to secrecy.
Let’s hope there’s intelligent life in outer space. I’m so lonely here.
There are only 10 kinds of people. Those who understand binary and those who don’t
If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried
Blonde and proud of it.
I’m not the girl your mom warned you about, her imagination was never this good.
Don’t follow me. I’m lost too.
This dog is a dog good dog way dog dog to dog trick dog an dog idiot dog for dog 30 dog seconds dog …now read without the word dog.
Life’s Too Short To Date Ugly Women.
The trouble with life is there’s no background music.
Punctuality is the virtue of the bored.
– Evelyn Waugh
3 out of 2 people have trouble with fractions.
99% of the women in this world are beautiful, the rest are in my college.
Everybody is somebody else’s weirdo.
I know I’m awesome just… You’re not.
I’m not bossy, I just know better.;)
I never finish anythi…
Music speaks the words we cannot seem to say <3
A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.
– Steve Martin
Hey, Wanna know how to keep an idiot waiting…”I’ll tell you tomorrow”…
What happens in this shirt, stays in this shirt.
Florida: the place where old people go to die.
Hand over the chocolate and no one gets hurt.
I’m not perfect but parts of me are.
Work sucks but I need the bucks.
Go fast, turn left!
If it’s too loud, you’re too old.
Hey, I’m up here ^
Take my advice.. I don’t use it anyway