Witty Quotes, Sayings with verbal humor

Come to think of it, when *isn’t* it a good idea to go limp and play dead???

Submitted by: John Alejandro King

If dreams really come true, what about nightmares.

Submitted by: Dyoung shall grow

Person 1: That lady looks really interesting.
Person 2: She looks like her daddy.

Submitted by: IAmunknown

I’m sorry, did that hurt? I thought that there was a gnat on your cheek.

Submitted by: IAmunknown

Understanding the single-line quote is like comprehending the bulky book with its title only and correctly.
– Anuj Somany

Submitted by: Anuj Somany

My kids seem to only listen to their music and not me; so I tried singing them their chores.

Submitted by: caesar

The squeaky wheel doesn’t always get the grease, sometimes it just gets replaced.

Submitted by: Patrick

Dear optimist, pessimist, and realist, while you guys were arguing about the glass of water, I drank it.

Sincerely, the opportunist.

Witty Quote: Dear optimist, pessimist, and realist, while you...

Submitted by: Mark Cromo
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That seems more of a your problem, than my problem!

Submitted by: AJ Johnson

Canada gave America Justin Bieber. America gave Canada the first nuclear wasteland.

Submitted by: Ali D.

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