Witty Quotes, Sayings with verbal humor
We have fought for our freedom, then we begin to accumulate laws to take it away from ourself.
If I’m driving you crazy just remember to put on your seat belt.
The problem with stealing quotes off the internet is you never know if they are genuine.
– Abraham Lincoln
When I get home at night I look up at the sky and talk to the stars pretending its you. It acts just like you though, very far away and never responds to anything I say.
An optimist is a person that falls off the empire state building and after 50 floor says so far so good!
If at first you don’t succeed, pay someone else to do it for you.
I would never jump in front of a bullet for someone..If I have time to jump they have time to move the hell out of the way.
When people ask me with a judging undertone just why it is i’m talking to myself, I answer them: “At least, this way, i’m sure that i’m talking to someone as intelligent as myself, which is as hard to find as a decent answer to that ridiculous question.”
I refuse to have a battle of wits against an unarmed opponent.
Don’t be so humble- you are not that great.
Indecision may or may not be my problem.
– Jimmy Buffett