Witty Quotes, Sayings with verbal humor - Page 4
We have fought for our freedom, then we begin to accumulate laws to take it away from ourself.
When I get home at night I look up at the sky and talk to the stars pretending its you. It acts just like you though, very far away and never responds to anything I say.
If at first you don’t succeed, pay someone else to do it for you.
If I’m driving you crazy just remember to put on your seat belt.
An optimist is a person that falls off the empire state building and after 50 floor says so far so good!
When people ask me with a judging undertone just why it is i’m talking to myself, I answer them: “At least, this way, i’m sure that i’m talking to someone as intelligent as myself, which is as hard to find as a decent answer to that ridiculous question.”
I refuse to have a battle of wits against an unarmed opponent.
Don’t be so humble- you are not that great.
I would never jump in front of a bullet for someone..If I have time to jump they have time to move the hell out of the way.
Indecision may or may not be my problem.
– Jimmy Buffett
The problem with stealing quotes off the internet is you never know if they are genuine.
– Abraham Lincoln