Witty Quotes, Sayings with verbal humor - Page 4

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Quickest way to get on your feet… miss a car payment.

Submitted by: Darell Hill

The voices in my head were arguing over who would be me today.

Submitted by: Darell Hill

Department of redundancy department.

Submitted by: Gary

He was a modest man, with much to be modest about.

Submitted by: Gary

I have an inferiority complex, but it’s not a very good one.
Steven Wright

Why isn’t the word “phonetically” spelled with an “f”?
Steven Wright

Witty Quote: Why isn’t the word “phonetically” spelled with...

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I’d kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
Steven Wright

Witty Quote: I’d kill for a Nobel Peace Prize....

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A child of five could understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five.
Groucho Marx

Witty Quote: A child of five could understand this....

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If life gives you lemons. Eat carrots.

Submitted by: Naila Boo

Save the world. Destroy humans.

Submitted by: christina
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