Witty Quotes, Sayings with verbal humor - Page 5

8

Sanity is the playground for the unimaginative.

Submitted by: amy o
57

If it were not for Thomas Edison, we would all be watching television in the dark.

Submitted by: Shorty
85

When people ask me with a judging undertone just why it is i’m talking to myself, I answer them: “At least, this way, i’m sure that i’m talking to someone as intelligent as myself, which is as hard to find as a decent answer to that ridiculous question.”

Submitted by: Sin
24

When you’re working in the hive, you have but two choices. To bee, or not to bee.

Submitted by: Paul
75

If I’m driving you crazy just remember to put on your seat belt.

Submitted by: Thomas
48

Newtons Law of Romance:
Love can neither be created nor be destroyed,
It can only be changed from one girl friend to another.

Submitted by: ice cream
13

Top 10 reasons I procrastinate:
10.

Submitted by: joseph
15

My imaginary friend thinks YOU have problems…

Submitted by: Torii :)
11

When life hands you lemons don’t be afraid to say “No thank you”.

Submitted by: Ashley Abrahams
11

I’m not bossy I just know what you should be doing.

Submitted by: hoodyninja
12

An important rule of procrastination: do it today but remember that today will be today again tomorrow.

Submitted by: Phil Sanchez
26

The other day at radio shack a manager was giving out dead batteries FREE OF CHARGE.

Submitted by: Ali
13

You only need a parachute if you’re skydiving twice.

Submitted by: Geraldine
11

I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate!

Submitted by: Glen
12

I used to get lost in the shuffle, but now I just shuffle along with the lost.

Submitted by: roger garrett
12

I used to be indecisive but now I’m not too sure.

Submitted by: quulkid
11

You may think the grass is greener on the other side, it may be because there’s more manure there!

Submitted by: Kathy Ashton
13

The voices in my head were arguing over who would be me today.

Submitted by: Darell Hill
9

Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.
Steven Wright

Witty Quote: Everywhere is within walking distance if you...

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11

A question that sometimes drives me hazy: Am I or the others crazy?
– Albert Einstein

Submitted by: maria
15

Understanding the single-line quote is like comprehending the bulky book with its title only and correctly.
– Anuj Somany

Submitted by: Anuj Somany
57

There’s nothing to fear. Except maybe that weird guy over there.

Submitted by: joshua michael levinson
9

Nothing but the future lies ahead.

Submitted by: Bud Black
23

My kids seem to only listen to their music and not me; so I tried singing them their chores.

Submitted by: caesar
22

That seems more of a your problem, than my problem!

Submitted by: AJ Johnson

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