Alcohol Quotes, Sayings about alcoholic drinks

The drunken man speaks the honest truth.

Submitted by: Jim Farrell on July 10, 2018

I make wine disappear. What’s your superpower?

A L C _ H _ L
Sometimes alcohol is the answer.

Whiskey is a great drink ? It makes you see double and feel single.

Submitted by: raymond joe on May 9, 2017

A real man is a woman’s best friend. He will never let her down. He will comfort her after a bad day. He will inspire her to do things she never thought she could do. He will enable her to express her deepest emotions. He will enable her to be confident, sexy, seductive and invincible. No, wait, sorry, I’m thinking of wine. It’s wine that does all that. Never mind.

Submitted by: Christie Landis on May 8, 2017

11. Thou shall not spilleth thy beer.

Submitted by: Tyrant on April 26, 2017

Alcohol makes you feel like you’re a breeze in life, it’s there to make the bad things go away for just a second but you always come back to reality and find yourself alone without a life.

Submitted by: cocobaby on April 15, 2017

In alcohol’s defense I’ve done some pretty dumb sh*t while completely sober too.

Step aside coffee this is a job for alcohol.

I only drink a little, but when I do, I turn into another person, and that person drinks a lot.

We’re all addicted to something that takes away the pain.

Of course size matters, no one wants a small glass of wine.

And then alcohol said “Put that on Facebook, it’s hilarious”. But alcohol was wrong, so very wrong.

The only bad thing about drinking and driving is the trees defend themselves really well.

Submitted by: Travin on March 28, 2017

If you know someone who tries to drown their sorrows, you might tell them sorrows know how to swim.
– Ann Landers


The first thing in the human personality that dissolves in alcohol is dignity.

One solution to all problems “Alcohol”.

Submitted by: shank on March 27, 2016

As a cure for worrying, work is better than whiskey.

I’m very serious about no alcohol, no drugs. Life is too beautiful.
Jim Carrey

Man, being reasonable, must get drunk; the best of life is but intoxication.
Lord Byron

The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.
Phyllis Diller

Great love affairs start with Champagne and end with tisane.
Honoré de Balzac

As I poured myself yet another glass of wine. After many. It occurred to me that I don’t have a drinking issue. No no. Only those who do not drink have a drinking issue.

Submitted by: Larissa on January 17, 2016

Wine is sunlight, held together by water.
Galileo Galilei

Boss. Sorry I can’t come to work today. I woke up this morning and hurt my hand trying to get the cap off my breakfast!

Submitted by: louis on November 10, 2015

An addict’s biggest flaw is in denial, till you admit your wrongdoings for everything else will be your biggest and most deadly flaw.

Submitted by: Rachaell Lahage on October 26, 2015

A man is a fool if he drinks before he reaches the age of 50, and a fool if he doesn’t afterward.
Frank Lloyd Wright

I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it.
Rodney Dangerfield

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.
Rodney Dangerfield

Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking.
Dave Barry

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