Only when you are drunk can your true creative side be seen.
I don’t need rehab…I need refill.
I am not drunk, I’m just chemically off- balanced…
I get a lot more from alcohol than alcohol gets from me.
To alcohol…The cause and solution to all of life’s problems.
Drink like a fish. Smoke like a chimney.. Tomorrow is another day..
Alcohol, because nothing good started with someone having a salad.
I only drink occasionally but everyday seems like my birthday.
People say I have an alcohol problem, and I say if there is still alcohol there is no problem.
Good thing I drove last night, I was way too drunk to walk home.
My father always said- “the day I can’t do my job drunk will be the day I hand in my badge and gun”.
Life is too short to stay sober.
If your date ain’t what you expected, drink till she is!!
Alcohol is the sweet poison having benefits less than harm.
She has many rare and charming qualities, but Sobriety is not one of them. – Jane Austen
Beer is better than a woman… It’s always there for you, never disappoints, always makes you feel good and doesn’t care if you drink out of another beer.
I have a drinking problem, two hands, one beer, that’s the problem.
I drink too much. The last time I gave a urine sample it had an olive in it. – Rodney Dangerfield
I don’t sleep, I pass out.
Alcohol is not a solution, but a temporary escape from reality.
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