Funny Men Quotes and Sayings

Husbands are like fine wine. They take time to mature.
– Letters to Juliet, the movie.

Submitted by: brooklynne on June 23, 2013

If women belong in the kitchen, shouldn’t men belong in the garage with all the other tools?! (- :

Submitted by: Ryleeeee on January 13, 2012

Some people think having large breasts makes a woman stupid. Actually, it’s quite the opposite: a woman having large breasts makes men stupid.
Rita Rudner

Men are like bank accounts, without money they don’t generate a lot of interest.

Submitted by: gyou on July 15, 2011

Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract!

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Things you’ll never hear a man say…

I never hated a man enough to give him his diamonds back.
– Zsa Zsa Gabor

They say, “Early to bed, early to rise makes a Man healty, wealthy and wise”, Well I’m not too sure if its entirely true, because I have never seen a healthy, wealthy and wise man.

Submitted by: Adity on November 20, 2009

Give a man a fish, he eats for a day. Teach a man to fish, every Saturday he and his friends will load up beer and go fishing.

Submitted by: Gray on January 22, 2011

The best way to get a man to do something is to suggest they are too old for it.

Men are from Mars, women are from Venus; ex’s are from Uranus.

Submitted by: Doug Dunn on December 9, 2012
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Q: Why is it so hard to find a man that’s caring, considerate, and nice?
A: Because he already has a boyfriend.

Submitted by: Beth on March 28, 2012

If at first you don’t succeed then you are probably a man.

Submitted by: alayna on July 20, 2011

My mom said the only reason men are alive is for lawn care and vehicle maintenance.
– Tim Allen

A man is always ready to go, it’s a women that says whether yes or no!

Submitted by: Peter on April 7, 2013

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