Funny Women Quotes and Sayings

A woman look ten times more beautiful when she is sleeping, but only to her husband.:P

Submitted by: Prateek on December 10, 2011

You know a women is about to say something smart when she starts her sentence with “A man once told me”…

Submitted by: frank on April 6, 2010

I think the inventor of the mirror is a man who was tired of always being asked how do I look by his wife.

Submitted by: Maduwa Thabo on September 27, 2015

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments.
Chris Rock

Women are like an email in your inbox, you cannot wait to open it, and when you open it, then you realize its a virus.

Submitted by: Nabil on September 4, 2009
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Two most deadly weapons in the world: Women’s nagging and Women’s tears! Can make any man act like a tortoise, right into the shell. Don’t believe me, try it…he he he:P

Submitted by: Ashish Mittal on December 14, 2011

Women want men, careers, money, children, friends, luxury, comfort, independence, freedom, respect, love, and a three-dollar pantyhose that won’t run.
Phyllis Diller

Halloween is for dressing as something you’re not. That’s why most girls go as sexy.

I don’t condone wife beating, but I understand it!

Submitted by: Marty on June 3, 2012

So I was up all night trying to make a website for women drivers, but it kept on crashing.

Submitted by: tom on January 23, 2012

Unlike women, the older the wine the sweeter it becomes.

Submitted by: Japhethmaiyo on January 14, 2012
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Fastest ways of communication, telephone, television, tell-a-woman.

Submitted by: phantom on February 3, 2016

What I don’t understand is how women can pour hot wax on their bodies, let it dry, then rip out every single hair by its root and still be scared of spiders.
Jerry Seinfeld

For most of history, Anonymous was a woman.
Virginia Woolf

Women are cute…until you marry them!!

Submitted by: Mukena on April 24, 2012

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