My Head

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My head is a place you would not understand
It’s like a faraway place or a distant land.
It’s a place where paranoia is normal
And nothing is formal.
So, you’re welcome to come inside
But nothing can prepare you for what you might find.
For every time I close my eyes
The person inside comes alive.
It screams and yells at the top of its voice
Until dreaming is no longer a choice.
It gets louder and louder
I have no power.
It’s just too strong
I can’t go on.
It tears me apart
Or what’s left of my heart.
Too many secrets to plunder
It’s pulling me under.
I run to that place inside
A place where I can hide.
But the voice is there
With me, so unaware.
Of what’s been going on
For so very long.

But now I understand
Why every time you hold my hand.
There is no feeling inside
Which is when I realise.
The person inside is being fed
Every second I’m in my head.
So talking is a waste of breath
And living is my death.

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