I trip and knock over a book shelf. Random person: “Smooth.” Me: “Thank you, I try.”
It’s okay, my sarcasm fixes your stupidity.
“Are you sarcastic?” “Well no duh!”
I’m not really good at giving advice, could I interest you in a sarcastic comment?
Oh I’m sorry, were we supposed to dress stupid today?
When life shuts a door in your face. Open it. That’s how doors work. Right?
There are two things in life that are infinite: Human stupidity and and it’s defense- >sarcasm.
Man…you are so funny, but hey looks aren’t everything.
You think you’re so smart? – No, I don’t. I’m actually pretty sure.
You call this fat? I call this a 1 Pack!
Oh I’m sorry, I’m not really good at acting like I care!
Instant idiot, just add alcohol!
You’d make the perfect blueprints to build an idiot!
Sarcasm is the last refuge of the imaginatively bankrupt. – Cassandra Clare
Person 1: What time is it? Person 2: Do I look like a clock to you?
So it seems a certain person believes that I have a problem with sarcasm. Well thank you Captain Obvious for that startling revelation!
You – “Well someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning!” Me – “I’m sorry there’s a correct side to be waking up on?” It takes patience to listen, however it takes absolute skill to pretend you’re listening. Excuse me love, would you like a skirt to go with that belt?!
Sarcasm, Just another service I offer. What do you offer? stupidity?
Be my guest and leave. You’re not stupid; you’re just not that smart.
I love you too much to let you be in peace.
“Why do you talk to yourself?” “Cos I like intelligent conversation.” So what do you want to do?…I dunno Well that helps a lot Oh, you hate your job? Why didn’t you say so? There’s a support group for that. It’s called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar. Why did you commit such a crime like that? He asked “Would you rather us commit a crime a different way?”
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