Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings

What did I do to give you the impression I actually care about what you think?

Sarcastic Quote: What did I do to give you...

Submitted by: The Crackling appleorb on August 6, 2009
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Congratulations, If you press the elevator button three times it goes into hurry mode – really…

Sarcastic Quote: Congratulations, If you press the elevator button...

Submitted by: maianaize on May 26, 2010
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You always do me a favor, when you shut up!

Sarcastic Quote: You always do me a favor, when...

Submitted by: Nana on January 31, 2009
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Mom: What did you learn in school today sweetheart?
Me: Obviously not enough. I have to go back tomorrow.

Sarcastic Quote: Mom: What did you learn in school...

Submitted by: cheesefri on November 17, 2011
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I’m definitely a morning person but often choose to sleep straight through it.

Sarcastic Quote: I’m definitely a morning person but often...

Submitted by: steve on October 27, 2009
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Sarcasm (n.) – the ability to insult idiots without them realizing it…!

Sarcastic Quote: Sarcasm (n.) – the ability to insult...

Submitted by: vasso on December 9, 2010
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Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit! Yet it remains the funniest!

Sarcastic Quote: Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit!...

Submitted by: lisa on September 10, 2008
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If you don’t want a sarcastic answer, don’t ask a stupid question.

Sarcastic Quote: If you don’t want a sarcastic answer,...

Submitted by: nicolw on July 6, 2010
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Don’t take yourself so seriously, no one else does.

Sarcastic Quote: Don’t take yourself so seriously, no one...

Submitted by: Sofia on December 4, 2012
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My imaginary friend says that you need a therapist.

Sarcastic Quote: My imaginary friend says that you need...

Submitted by: vera lemon on February 7, 2010
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Oh… I didn’t tell you…. Then it must be none of your business.

Sarcastic Quote: Oh… I didn’t tell you…. Then it...

Submitted by: Jennifer on October 19, 2012
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Are you really stupid or you are just pretending?

Sarcastic Quote: Are you really stupid or you are...

Submitted by: bmt on November 3, 2009
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My neighbor’s diary says that I have boundary issues.

Sarcastic Quote: My neighbor’s diary says that I have...

Submitted by: dave title on March 10, 2013
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I’m not sarcastic. I’m just intelligent beyond your understanding.

Sarcastic Quote: I’m not sarcastic. I’m just intelligent beyond...

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Sarcasm: Helping the intelligent politely tolerate the obtuse for thousands of years.

Sarcastic Quote: Sarcasm: Helping the intelligent politely tolerate the...

Submitted by: Grouchier Marx on January 30, 2010
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You are about as useful as a white crayon.

Sarcastic Quote: You are about as useful as a...

Submitted by: James on July 1, 2011
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Hey! I had a shoes like those once, then my father got a job.

Sarcastic Quote: Hey! I had a shoes like those...

Submitted by: mewntx on June 16, 2010
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Just because the voices only talk to me doesn’t mean you should get all jealous. You’re just a little too crazy for their taste.

Sarcastic Quote: Just because the voices only talk to...

Submitted by: vera lemon on February 7, 2010
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We have a love and hate relationship….. He loves me, I hate him.

Sarcastic Quote: We have a love and hate relationship….....

Submitted by: Jennifer on May 16, 2010
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Don’t argue with fools, cos people from a distance can’t tell which one is you.

Sarcastic Quote: Don’t argue with fools, cos people from...

Submitted by: J-rock on September 16, 2009
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Life’s good, you should get one.

Sarcastic Quote: Life’s good, you should get one.

Submitted by: TTres on April 12, 2012
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WAIT…I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.

Sarcastic Quote: WAIT…I’m trying to imagine you with a...

Submitted by: jo-c on February 11, 2010
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Person: Go to hell!
Me: I must already be in Hell since you’re still standing here.

Sarcastic Quote: Person: Go to hell! Me: I must...

Submitted by: Nick on December 14, 2012
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Fighting with me is like being in the special olympics. You may win, but in the end you’re still a retard.

Sarcastic Quote: Fighting with me is like being in...

Submitted by: GaiaGadzook on September 17, 2009
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Cancel my subscription because I don’t need your issues.

Sarcastic Quote: Cancel my subscription because I don’t need...

Submitted by: ninja on June 18, 2010
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I became so religious so that I could pray for you to burn in hell.

Sarcastic Quote: I became so religious so that I...

Submitted by: Vuyie on March 23, 2013
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Sarcasm, because beating the crap out of people is illegal

Sarcastic Quote: Sarcasm, because beating the crap out of...

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I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and I don’t want to see you everyday!
Sarcastic Quote: I’d tell you to go to hell,...

Submitted by: Pugbear on May 12, 2010
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Ugliness can be fixed, stupidity is forever.

Sarcastic Quote: Ugliness can be fixed, stupidity is forever.

Submitted by: michelle on April 15, 2010
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Shut your mouth when you’re talking to me.

Sarcastic Quote: Shut your mouth when you’re talking to...

Submitted by: chellaki on August 26, 2010
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