Sarcastic Quotes, Sarcasm Sayings

Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either.

Submitted by: =)=)=)=) on November 29, 2013

Zombies eat brains. You’re safe.

Submitted by: kate on November 26, 2013

Sarcasm (because punching people in the face is illegal) <3.

Submitted by: Rose on September 29, 2013

I don’t believe in plastic surgery,
But in your case,
Go ahead.

Submitted by: Bubbles on September 25, 2013

Tell me… Is being stupid a profession or are you just gifted?

Submitted by: katx. on September 19, 2013

I clapped because it’s finished, not because I like it.

Submitted by: Angel Geo on August 30, 2013

There is a fine line between fashion and circus. So where’s the tent?

Submitted by: Alex on June 9, 2013

The only thing to fear is fear itself and what 9 out of 10 doctors would prescribe.

Submitted by: shawnn on June 8, 2013

Mom: Have you picked out what you’re wearing to school tomorrow?
Me: Yeah.
Mom: What is it?
Me: Clothes!

Submitted by: Ylime Eyaf Steehs on May 28, 2013

Person 1: Are you watching TV on the couch?
Person 2: No, I’m sitting on the TV and watching the couch.

Submitted by: Darian on May 12, 2013

I am not bad. I am just dangerously awful.

Submitted by: Tiela Selepe on May 12, 2013

Instant idiot, just add alcohol!

You’d make the perfect blueprints to build an idiot!

Submitted by: Morgan Decker on May 10, 2013

Have you heard about the discount for deodorant from Nivea?

Submitted by: Ema on May 7, 2013

No sh*t Sherlock!

Submitted by: Java the hut on May 7, 2013

If ignorance is bliss. You must be the happiest person on this planet.

Submitted by: derek dsemre on May 5, 2013

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